Welcome to NYC, Baby
by Tricycle Of Awesomeness
Summary: Young love, road trips and boy bands take three girls on an adventure they will not soon forget... Neither will their parents. Based on the children from There is a Light, Fridays at Noon and Edward Cullen, Dick for Hire. AH/FUN
1. Chapter 1,  the GChat

**A/N: This story is brought to you by three insane ladies who cannot let go of certain characters we love to write. Just for clarity sake, in case you're reading this and are unfamiliar (I don't know why you're reading this if you're unfamiliar, but regardless...) THEA = Little One, from "There is a Light" by belladonnacullen, FAITH = Pennylove from "Fridays at Noon" by Troublefollows1017 and HANNA = The Dick's kid from "Edward Cullen, Dick for Hire" by FictionFreak95.  
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**OK, that being said, here's one small _FYI _for everyone: When we wrote the Play Date, it seemed as though, as a "one-shot", it confused some with the influx of changing POV's throughout, so we've decided to break this one up and post it as separate chapters. We'll be updating daily until it's complete. There are 23 short chapters so you have a couple of options here... you can come back daily, take the ride along with us, or come back in 23 days and read it as a whole. Either way, we hope you enjoy this one as much as we have. **

**BIG THANKS TO: SueBee the tassel wearing beta fairy, and SerenaInNC for the time she took to pre-read.  
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**BIG LOVE TO YOU GUYS. And thanks for reading. **

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><p><strong> Chapter 1 - The GChat<strong>

**Sunday, August 19th 10:15 PM PST**

**~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~x****~x~******

**THEA_JEEBER212**: I love him so much!

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: *yawn*

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I think it's romantic.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: you know he's like 80, right?

**THEA_JEEBER212**: Hanna. Please. He's 31.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: And cute. Not as cute as Nico Janus, but cute.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: The Janus Brothers are cute, but they aren't manly like Dustin.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Speaking of old men, you do know all the creepy old guys in the world are probably stalking you, right Faith?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: What do you mean?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: "have a little Faith"? Really?

**THEA_JEEBER212**: *snicker*

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I don't get it.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Which part do you want them to have exactly?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: OMG Hanna!

**THEA_JEEBER212**: *DED*

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: seriously Thea, I heard he got that Brazilian chick pregnant last month

**THEA_JEEBER212**: He did not. Edward says you can't believe those gossip magazines, Hanna... seriously.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: He couldn't have gotten her pregnant, they're not even married. Duh.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Um...

**THEA_JEEBER212**: Um...

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: What?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: *smh* Nothing. So what are you planning on doing about this crush you have, Thea?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I could ask Daddy to get him to play at my birthday party.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: That's in like 8 months! Way too far away. No, here's the thing: MTV wants to give Edward the lifetime achievement award. He doesn't really want to go, but maybe if I beg...

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Say what? SWEET!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: That's so cool!

**THEA_JEEBER212**: IKR? And Dustin's going to perform, and if I can just get backstage when he's backstage, and then we meet and he sees me. *Sigh*

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: *blank stare*

**THEA_JEEBER212**: What now, Hanna?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Re-living someone else's life much?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Be nice. If you were in love with someone, we would be supportive.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: I know he'll feel the same once he meets me. He has to.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: I just don't wanna see you get your hopes up about this...

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I think it's sweet. How can we help?

**THEA_JEEBER212**: I need to get backstage WITHOUT my mom.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: hmmm

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Her hmmms scare me.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: Her hmmms give me hope.

….

….

**THEA_JEEBER212**: Hanna! Hellooooooo...

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: I think I have an idea.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: YES!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I forgot her ideas scare me more than her hmmms.

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Faith, we're gonna need some money for greasing palms. Thea, you need to go shopping...think sexy.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: I was already thinking sexy, but what's the plan? And how are you gonna get here? Faith can get her dad to take her anywhere, but YOUR dad... ?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Got it covered girls. No worries. :)


	2. Chapter 2, Thea

**A/N: Some questions have arisen. Some we can answer, some we cannot (we'd really rather the story answer most). But this one we _can_: Ages are as follows: Faith is 14 (nearly 15!), Thea is 16, and Hanna is _just_ 17. We're hoping not to corn-fuse anyone too much... hence the dates and times and POV naming... so play attention. {smiles}... seriously. It's all in fun... and maybe some heart clenching. **

**On a Another note, we sincerely thank you for reading our fuckery.**

**LOVE.  
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><p><strong>Chapter 2: THEA<strong>

**Sunday, August 19th 11:30 PM Pacific Time**

I love him.

I totally love him.

He's not like the boys at my school. (I mean, he's not a boy). He's not like anyone I know. He's super tall and he has that swooshy hair and those big blue eyes. He sings about love, and it's like it's straight from the heart and he's singing about me - he just doesn't know it yet.

Maybe it all sounds silly, but my mom met Edward when she was pretty much my age. And Edward was just about Dustin's age. And Mom doesn't like to talk about it so much, and Edward doesn't like to talk about it too much either, but I know they fell in love right away, like, as soon as they saw each other.

Edward was this super famous rock star and, even though Mom was just a teenager, he saw how cool she was and how she was perfect for him and he's loved her ever since. He says he's never loved anyone else. He says she saved him. That's how love works. I am _so_ in love.

I could totally save Dustin if he needed it - like from some Brazilian girl trying to blackmail him.

I'm going to meet him and save him and we're going to be so happy together.

Hanna's going to make sure of it. She has the best plans ever, except for that time Faith had to bail her out, but this is totally different. This is just about meeting the love of my life.

We'll meet backstage and we'll talk and he'll invite me to the after-party and Edward and Mom will see how he looks at me, just like Edward looks at Mom, and they'll have to approve.

He'll hold my hand all night, and then, before I have to go, he'll lean in and my heart will pound, but my palms won't get sweaty, and we'll kiss and it will be perfect. And he has a jet, so he'll just fly to San Francisco whenever he can, just to be with me, just like Edward did until Mom let him move in. Because he loves me.

Dustin just doesn't know it yet. And he won't know it unless I get Edward to take mom and me to the awards.

I tiptoe down the stairs. Edward likes to stay up late reading and writing and stuff with Mom, but she has a headache tonight and she's in bed. I'm pretty sure it'll be easier to convince Edward without her around. She can see right through me. She'd probably say no without even knowing exactly why.

I find Edward exactly where I thought he'd be -in the big leather chair in Mom's office. He glances up as I hang back by the doorway.

"You're up late."

"Uh huh."

"You want to talk?" he asks, scooting over in the chair.

I'm a little big for that, but I'm on a mission. I take a seat and Edward puts his arm around me. I lean into his side. He's like my dad #2. It's hard to remember life before he was around.

"Why won't you go to the awards?" I ask really quietly.

Edward sighs. "I don't need an award. You and your mom are my awards."

"But this is a really special award."

"To whom?" Edward asks.

This time I sigh. I need to try a different strategy. This is _really_ important. "Mom thinks it's special."

Edward chuckles. "She always did like MTV."

"See?" I say and I twist around to look Edward in the eye and make my point.

"Does anyone else think this is a really special award? Anyone else... in this room, perhaps?"

I shrug and look at my hands.

"Does anyone else in this room want to go so they can be in the same place as Dus -"

"No!" I interrupt and shake my head violently.

Edward chuckles. "No. Of course not."

We settle into an uncomfortable silence.

"Edward?"

"Thea?"

"I think you should go and get your award because you deserve it and because if you weren't a rock star once, you wouldn't have met Mom. And, _maybe_, because I want to be in the same place as Dustin Jeeber."

Edward kisses the top of my head. "Fine, Little One. I'll tell them in the morning."


	3. Chapter 3, Faith

**A/N: We just want to thank you for all the love out there for these three girlies. Try not to overthink the fact that they are all related to Cullens and Swans. They don't think about it. LOL :)**

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: FAITH<strong>

**Monday, August 20th 8:30 AM Pacific Time**

Just ask him. He'll say yes. He always says yes. He never says no. It's almost like he can't say no to me. What if he asks questions? What if he wants to know why I want to go all of a sudden? What if Mom says no? Mom says no. A lot.

"You're so quiet, Pennylove. That's not like you. Everything all right?" Daddy looks over the morning paper at me. He's dressed for work in his suit and tie. For some reason that makes him a million times more intimidating. My father has quite a commanding presence when he's not just my dad.

"Um, I'm fine." I sound nervous. Too nervous. I hate being sneaky. Being sneaky is so hard. Almost impossible in this house with these parents, all the other grown ups that are here all the time, and the nosiest ten year old brother on the planet.

Lala puts her hand on my forehead. "No fever."

I roll my eyes. Mom sees and gives me the stink eye. "Is there something on your mind?"

She's going to say no. She's going to say something about school starting and all that, even though she knows I'll make sure everything's done and perfect. Why can't Mom be like Dad?

"Daddy, I was wondering if you know anyone who can get tickets to the MTV Music Video Awards next month for me and my friend Hanna. Our friend Thea's stepdad is getting a special award and we really want to be there."

"And she wants to see The Janus Brothers," Alec teases in that annoying voice that makes me want to tell Cupcake to bite him in the butt.

"I don't even know if The Janus Brothers are going to be there," I lie. "I want to go for Thea. Not The Janus Brothers. Mind your business." I scowl at him, but he laughs, unfazed by my wrath. He knows I'm all bark and no bite. Mom says it's what makes me my father's daughter. I'm not sure why she says that because a lot of people are scared of Daddy. Like Tyler. He's super strong and brave but does whatever Daddy says.

"School will be in full swing by then," Mom notes as expected. "New York City is on the other side of the country."

I cross my arms and cock my head a little to the side. I love when she states the obvious like I'm a baby. "It's on a weekend, Mother. If I have homework, I can do it on the plane. The plane that can easily fly me to New York City."

Daddy sets the paper down and stares at me with those intense eyes, not the soft 'I love you to the moon and back' ones. I am not good at being bad. If he keeps looking at me and doesn't speak, I'm going to confess the whole plan and ruin everything for Thea. Then Hanna is going to make fun of me for being a big fat baby who can't figure out how to be even the tiniest bit devious.

"I can get tickets, if that's what you want."

"And backstage passes and tickets to be the fan pit so we can be in front of the stage for the performances?" I go for all of it, hoping Mom lets him say yes.

"I'm Edward Masen, am I not?"

I jump out of my seat and throw myself on him. "I love you! I love you! I love you!"

Daddy wraps his arms around me and hugs me back. "You're a good girl, Pennylove. You make your mother and me very proud. This is a privilege you have earned."

Immediately, I go from being the happiest girl in the world to the guiltiest. I bury my head in his shoulder so I don't start crying. How does Hanna do it? This is going to _kill_ me.


	4. Chapter 4, Hanna

**A/N: Thanks for continuing on this road of teen-aged treachery with us!  
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><p><strong>Chapter 4. HANNA<strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 3PM Eastern Standard Time**

After pacing outside his office for about twenty minutes, psyching myself up, I walk in to find my dad at his desk, reading something quietly to himself with that all too familiar scowl on his face. _Ugh. _Everything I've tried with him and mom over the past few weeks has failed miserably. This is my last ditch effort.

I approach him with caution, but hope. He's always been easier to persuade when he's busy doing something and not really paying attention to what I'm asking.

Most of the time anyway.

Sometimes.

Every once in a while.

Suddenly I'm really nervous but I find my nerves again.

_Here goes nothin'._

"Dad, I need the car."

He doesn't even budge. Like, not even an inch. _God, I hate it when he ignores me. _

"Dad."

"I don't fucking think so, Hanna." _God, I hate it even more when he's only _acting _like he's ignoring me. _

He hits some keys on his laptop and then pushes his chair over to the printer to grab the papers out of it as they finish spitting out. _Probably so I wouldn't see them._

"Dad."

He's reading over something that looks like it's really pissing him off as he answers me. "You remember when you borrowed your mom's car 2 months ago?"

"Yes, but..."

"You remember that huge ass dent in the front fender you came home with?"

"Yes... _but_..."

"And do you fucking remember how much _I _ended up paying to get that shit fixed?"

I let out a sigh of defeat. Sort of. "Yes."

No more _buts_. I realize he isn't gonna make this easy.

Dad looks up at me, finally. "Then like I said, I don't fucking think so."

And I narrow my eyes at him, thinking, _The blackmail card seems to work every once in a blue moon._

"You know Mom doesn't like it when you use that word around me."

His eyebrow go up and I know what's coming. "Don't even try that shit with me, kid, you know it's not gonna work."

_Dammit. Why does he have to be such a know it all?_

"Fine. I won't _borrow _the car," I tell him sarcastically. _Technicalities... technicalities._

"Goddamn right, you won't."

I turn to go, nonchalantly telling him, "I have homework to finish up, I'll be upstairs for a while." _But not a very long while._

"Great."

Once I round the corner and I'm sure no one's following me, I run for it, up the stairs to my room and I lock the door behind me. I grab a few things, stuffing them into my backpack as fast as possible. I pull my hair into a tight ponytail, make my way out of my bedroom window, and sneak over to Dad's Mustang.

Getting the keys obviously would have made this whole thing a lot easier, but I know how to hot-wire a car, so no big. Dad showed me himself one time when he was explaining why I might need the skill at some point in my life.

Little did he know then, that that time would be when he was trying to keep me from helping a friend out.

A best friend.

One of them... _both of them. _This is important. And there's no way I'm missing it.

I'm pretty sure I'm clean and clear of DC too, until I get pulled over for running one of those _stupid _red lights that only stay green for like, ten seconds. I mean, for the love of peanuts, I need to make the best time I can if I'm gonna make it up to NYC in time to meet Faith and Thea.

Right?

I don't even bother saying anything to the officer as he approaches my window. I know what's coming. So, I pull the old trembling lip routine.

"License and registration, please?"

Waterworks, check.

"Miss?"

Oh, he's a pushy little... I am clearly gonna need to break out the big guns here. "I'm sorry, I just, my Uncle Emmett..." I clear my throat a little for dramatic effect, pushing back the fake tears. "McCarty... he told me to go straight home after I babysat for him tonight and I didn't... I just ran by McDonald's because I was _really _hungry, see? And I was trying to make up some time so my dad wouldn't notice I took too long, but this stupid light was..."

"Did you say Emmett... _McCarty_?"

"Y... yeah?" I make the puppy dog eyes for him. Men hate _and _love the puppy dog eyes. I know that because Mom makes them at Dad all the time and every time he scowls at her, but every time, she gets her way.

Ya gotta love the puppy dog eyes.

"As in, _Sergeant_, Emmett McCarty?"

"Yes?" I wipe some tears away. "Why? Do you know him?"

Of course he knows him, everyone knows him. He's part of the reason I'm not invited to most of the good parties around town. My father is the other part. Between the two of them, anyone who doesn't wanna get raided half way through having a good time won't come near me with a twenty foot pole.

I know right? Welcome to _my_ world.

"He's your uncle, huh?"

"That's right. He doesn't live far from here, and I'm just around the corner..." The officer looks around like he's thinking about something and then smiles down at me.

_Bingo, baby!_

"Ya know what? That light needs some adjusting anyway, and there isn't much traffic out here tonight which means it's not like you were really putting anyone in danger, so..."

"Oh wow, really? You're letting me off the hook? Thank you _so _much, officer! I promise I'll stop at _every _single light from now on, no matter what!"

Schmoozing is a fine art, you know. My dad never seems to see the need for it in his line of work, but at least _I_ know there are other ways of getting the job done, besides force and intimidation.

I sit there, smile nicely and patiently wait for the nice officer to pull away before I start off again. Once I'm on the 295 headed due North, I punch it.

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><p><strong>TF loves Hanna and her dad. js<strong>


	5. Chapter 5, Lightward

**A/N: Our beta, SueBee Tassel wearer and pre-readers, momof4, shana & KiKi are the bestest. **

**And THANKS for reading by the way!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 5 - Lightward<br>**

**Sunday, September 9th, 5:00 PM EST**

Thea's been locked in her bathroom in our hotel suite for close to an hour. She's so excited and anxious about going to this award thing that the entire hotel nearly vibrates with teenage angst. The only time I've laid eyes on her since two this afternoon is when I caught sight of a shock of purple leather and black sparkly leggings when she rushed to find her ringing cellphone, and then promptly locked herself back in the bathroom.

Bella raises her eyebrows at me after Thea denies her bathroom access for the fifth time.

"What did I do?" I ask, wincing in advance at her answer. I know very well what I've done. If it weren't for giving into Thea, we wouldn't be here in the first place.

Bella takes a seat next to me and leans her head against my shoulder.

"You're too good," she sighs.

I stifle a bitter laugh. That's not what I expected to hear.

"Really, you're too good. I know you're here just for her, even though I also know you're completely freaked out about how ga-ga she is over this Dustin guy."

Freaked out? Fucking terrified is more like it. Thea's insane happiness is the source of my terror; I hate it, but it can't be denied.

"You're the one that heard her on the phone the other day. She said she 'loved' him, Bella."

"She has a schoolgirl crush. It happens."

Well, I don't remember it happening to Elizabeth. Not like this. In fact, I called my other daughter at university just the other day and tried to get her to try to talk some sense into Thea, but she only laughed and told me to mind my business.

"Are all crushes this... intense?" I wonder out loud.

"Mine was," Bella murmurs. Her hand finds my knee.

"Exactly," I sigh, rubbing a hand over my eyes, trying to rub out troubling parts of the past. Those memories always hover like gray ghosts at the edge of my field of vision. These last few weeks watching Thea, they've taken on a more solid form.

"You were nothing but a gentleman," Bella assures me.

Sure. A gentleman that checked out her tits. A gentleman that held her hand and dreamed of tearing off her top.

"We're not going," I huff.

"She's not climbing into a car with this guy. She's watching him on stage. And that experience, seeing someone you're crushing on, larger than life, with all the lights and the screaming, that's something that's priceless. Even if we'd never met, Edward, I would still have wanted the chance to be there that day," Bella explains. "You, of all people, can't really keep her from going to rock concerts."

"I think maybe me, of all people, knows that she has some unrealistic expectations. I know that it's not all love ballads and candy fucking hearts."

"This is just a silly MTV thing. She's going to be there with us and at the end, we're going to take her home."

"Maybe this time. But she's just so in love with... love. So gung-ho. It's worrisome."

Bella sighs. "Her heart's going to break one day, Sweetie, probably because some stupid kid does something inconsiderate and dumb. I don't want to see it happen either. But after it does, she's going to have four loving parents there to support her and help her pick up the pieces. She's going to have some solid examples of what real love is."

I hold onto Bella. I know what she's saying makes sense. I want to give Thea this chance, which is why I agreed to be here, but I want to find a way to tell her to be careful with her heart. I want her to have her fairytale, even though I know that real life comes with pain.

"Anyway, Edward, tonight's not really about Dustin Jeeber. Tonight, my dear, is really all about you."

"MT-fucking-V," I mutter. "Christ."

"I used to watch it to get a rise out of you," she chuckles.

"Yeah, well it worked," I laugh.

"And maybe later I could... get a rise out of you?" she whispers as her lips slide along my neck. "After subjecting you to all of this horrible, sanitized, commercialized MT-fucking-V."

"If you're lucky."

"I do get to spend the rest of my natural life with you. Don't I?" Her big brown eyes find mine.

I sigh. I nod. I wish we had a couple of lifetimes to make up for all the time we've lost. "That makes you feel lucky?" I ask, checking in.

"The luckiest," she replies. I can't help but agree.

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><p><strong>AN: Hmm... They're just going to pick up an award, come back to the hotel & get a rise out of Edward. Bella's become an optimist. **

**We're so glad you're reading. Thanks! xoxo  
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	6. Chapter 6, The Dick

**A/N: We have the bestest beta & pre-readers. LOVE! **

**Someone's about to go Dickity in three... two...  
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><p><strong>Chapter 6: The Dick<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th. Approximately 3:45PM Eastern Standard Time**

"Is he kidding me with this shit?"

_Jesus fucking Christ._

I mean seriously, am I _this _desperate for a new case now that I'm creepin' up on the big five-oh? My head hurts just thinkin' about some of the ridiculous shit people seem to be under the impression are worthy of an "investigation".

Did I mention I'm also thinkin' about early retirement?

Swan is standing at the doorway, leaning against the jamb watching me. I don't actually notice her 'till she asks me what's wrong.

"Fucking..." I flick the piece of paper in my hand. "Client wants us to travel to fucking _Bejing _to get his half million dollar naked mole rat _pet _back?" I don't even bother stifling the laugh.

Like I said, it's ridiculous. "Highly fucking doubtful."

Swan's come hither and kiss the motherfuck out of me lips to try and hide the amusement but she's not fucking fooling anyone. Especially me.

"Are you hungry?"

The papers are dropped and I'm already forgetting the Bullshit. That job's not happening, anyway. "Starving."

"Want me to make something?"

"Hell no, Swan, that application put me in the mood for some Chang's, I'll go pick it up."

Her mouth twists and I'm suddenly tempted to bag dinner all together. Maybe take her back to the bedroom... lock the door even. _Not that it would do us any good. _ "I love you. You know that?" she says.

I pull her into a kiss that answers the question in itself but then I teaser her, anyway. "Goddamn right ya do."

Half way to the front door I'm debating calling Hanna down to go with me to Chang's. She loves the 'Stang and admittedly, I'm feeling a _little _bad about blowin' her off the way I did with regards to borrowing the car but then think better of it. 'Cause if she's in the middle of homework, it's usually best to just... you know, let her finish the fucking homework.

So I grab the keys to Eleanor, then my jacket and head out to...

No car.

_Kay..._

I look around, thinkin' maybe Swan's borrowed her again and just... I dunno, parked her somewhere else, but still...

No.

Fucking.

Car.

_Okay, calm down, Cullen. Clearly someone is havin' some sort of mid-life fucking crisis if they were stupid enough to take your goddman car._

I try to remain calm. Honest to fucking God.

As I walk back into the house, I try to practice those... Sutra fucking breathing techniques Tanya's always trying to get me to incorporate into my life since having a kid, but...

"Uh oh, what's wrong."

Swan knows the look well. Hell she even knows the look before the look appears most of the time.

And yeah, I am one seriously ranting motherfucker when I wanna be.

A chair or two get kicked over in the process until I realize... Hanna's usually right there in the thick of things when I start goin' off about somethin'. She always wants to know who, what, where, when, and how of the shit I'm goin' through on a daily basis. She calls it "hands on training" for when she enters the field after college.

Which is encouraging that she's at least not mentioning words like "The Academy" or "Police Force"... ya know what I'm sayin'?

So I stop my rant pretty abruptly before holding a hand up to Swan to stop her from asking me what I was thinking and I wait... listening for movement up stairs.

_Nothin'._

Then a few choice words pop into my head from the earlier conversation with my soon to be dead daughter.

_"Fine, I won't _"borrow" _the car..."_

_"I have _"homework to do"_... I'll be upstairs for a while..."_

"God_dammit_."

"What?"

Swan's not following. And why would she be? She unfortunately wasn't there when Hanna set me the fuck up for this shit. Maybe if she had been, my fucking car wouldn't be missing.

"Hanna!" I yell up the stairs but even as I holler for her, I know she's not gonna answer.

Number one... It's Sunday, Hanna doesn't _do _homework on Sundays. She always does her homework the minute she gets home from school, if not before. She likes to get that shit outta the way so she has the entire rest of the night... _or weekend_... to chat with her friends and do... you know, whatever _other _social activities she has lined up.

And numero two... when she _wants _to find that loophole the in restrictions we put on her, but _can't_? She usually ends up being the _creator _of said loopholes.

_Way to stay on top of shit, Cullen. _

I mean seriously? Have I _not _told Swan I suck at this fatherhood thing? Several times? 'Cause let's be completely fucking honest here, it's pretty much _my _fault. I should have been paying more attention to the hints Hanna was droppin' but _nooo_... I was too wrapped up in reading about naked fucking mole rats and Beijing and shit.

I let out some air, trying to control my tempter but in all honesty, that's just not gonna happen my friends. 'Cause it seems like when it comes to Hanna and me, she pushes my buttons like a motherfucker and I somehow do the exact same to her.

Swear to God it's not on purpose or anything, I don't think... but it _is _pretty much like some kind of goddamn curse or somethin'.

So instead of trying to explain to Swan the events that had led up to our current conversation, I simply reach for my cell phone, dial up the Jazzmeister and wait for the opportunity to find out just exactly where in the mother of _fuck _Hanna had to go that was so goddamn important that she felt the need to steal my fucking car.

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><p><strong>AN: oh, Hanna... Hanna Hanna Hanna.**

**THANKS for reading!  
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	7. Chapter 7, Thea

**A/N: A huge thank you to SueBee for beta'ing with such tasselicious style, and to our pre-readers, SerenInNC and momof4, and of course to everyone that's reading and reviewing and taking this ride with us.  
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><p><strong>Chapter 7 - THEA<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 7:00 PM EST**

"Faith!" I yell at the top of my lungs. "Faith!"

She doesn't hear me at all. She's, like, twenty feet and five hundred people away, and she's being totally blocked by her security guy, Tyler. I wish he wasn't here with her and her dad. I mean, not only is Tyler going to make this scheme of ours a million times harder, but I totally thought he was gay a long time ago and I think I even said it to his face. I really hope he doesn't remember that.

"Come on, guys," I plead, trying to pull my parents through the crowd toward my friend.

Edward refused to walk the carpet, but it's still hard to try to move through the lobby with all the reporters and their microphones and notepads holding us up at every step. It's even hard for me to stay focused and keep my eyes on the prize when I'm surrounded by people like Lady Na-Na dressed head to toe in smoked salmon, and the entire cast of Glum - that new emo musical on FOX.

My step-dad does not look happy with any of it, but he still smiles when he glances down at me. His smile's a little sad, but that's just Edward. He's always a little sad around the edges. It's what makes him him. I know he'd be way sadder if he was here alone, instead of with me and my mom.

"We're not going to miss it, Thea. Take a deep breath," he advises.

"But I need to see Faith! She's right over there!" I explain urgently as I point in my friend's direction.

"The girl you were on the phone with _all_ afternoon?" Mom asks.

I ignore the point she's trying to make.

"Faith!" I shout even louder, waving my hand over my head, trying desperately to catch her attention.

Her security guy hears me this time around. His eyes meet mine and I die a little inside and feel myself blushing all over. But at least he taps Faith on the shoulder and points me out, even if I did call him a gay superhero once upon a time. He's a nice guy.

Faith squeals and she says something in Tyler's ear, and suddenly he's magically making a path through the crowd so Faith and I can be together.  
>In just a few seconds we're jumping and giggling and squealing and holding on to one another for support.<p>

"I can't believe we're here!" she laughs.

"I know!"

"Are you dying?"

I can only nod. Of course I'm dying. I'm going to meet the love of my life in only about two hours.

"Here's the pass to get up in the crowd when he's singing." I can't help squealing again as she slips it over my head.

"You think Hanna's going to get here in time to -"

"To see him?" I finish for her, glancing cautiously at all the grown-ups we're surrounded by. We're just supposed to be excited about getting to see Dustin Jeeber perform. Not about tricking Tyler and getting backstage and falling in love. I know Faith's ridiculously smart, but she's not exactly cunning. "Of course she'll make it here in time. Hanna's good like that."

Faith hugs me again. My heart's beating a mile a minute.

"I'm so excited for you!" she whispers in my ear.

God, I'm almost crying. I must be in love. Right?

"Do I look okay?" I ask.

Faith looks me over. "You look so much old-, um, so perfect, I mean!" she says as she carefully studies me from head to toe. "At least seventeen," she whispers in my ear. "And totally rock 'n roll."

"Thanks," I sigh, smoothing out my leather dress self-consciously. I _had_ to look perfect and mom won't even let me wear platforms yet, so it wasn't easy. "You look really pretty, too," I add. Her dress is pale pink and sparkly and I bet it cost a million dollars. It's totally sweet and innocent looking - totally Faith. I almost feel bad that we talked her into this. I don't think she's actually lied to her parents before, like, ever.

"Faith," I sigh, trying to figure out what to say, and how to say it in code, so our parents won't hear.

"I am _so_ glad that I could be here with you tonight," she says, and squeezes my hand. "_Really_, glad."

"Really?"

"Absolutely."

"Yeah?"

"Totally."

"Wow. Thank you _so_ much." I hope those five words say like a million more. She gives me the biggest hug ever, and I think maybe I managed to let her know how much this all means to me.

Faith and I both glance up as we hear Tyler telling my mom and Edward that he'll keep a close eye on us. I roll my eyes at Faith and hope really hard that Hanna makes it here on time. Without Hanna we don't have any kind of chance of getting away from Tyler, and I honestly don't know if I'd even have the courage to go through with it all. Faith gives my arm a reassuring squeeze and lets me know it's all going to work out.

I really, really hope so.


	8. Chapter 8, The Dick

**A/N: **Mucho mucho gracias' to SueBee for beta'ing and to ****SerenInNC and momof4 for ****pre-reading the fuckery. You guys made this process a whole helluva lot easier.****

**** And thanks to everyone reading about three girls and their parents whom we love dearly even though they only *really* exist in our minds.  
><strong>**

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><p><strong>Chapter 8 - The Dick<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 4:00PM Eastern Standard Time**

"Yo yo."

"Jasper, it's..."

"Dude."

I have to just simply shake my fucking head. Even I don't get why I say it anymore.

I don't waste time with explaining myself too much, though. Not with Jasper. It's just not needed. "Listen, I need a solid."

"Shoot."

"Hanna..." the home phone rings, interrupting my ass, and I tell Jasper to hold on after Swan tells me it's Emmett, and that he says it's important.

"What."

"You sound stressed, bro. Did DC Metro already call or something?"

Again... I ask... although with a different tone of fucking voice this time, "_What_?"

"Uh... maybe this isn't a good time."

"Em. Spit it out."

"Did you loan Hanna the car tonight?"

_Shit_. I just know he's gonna fucking tell me she had another goddamn accident... or better yet, that she snuck into some place she's not supposed to be fucking sneaking into or somethin'... and then I'm sincerely... gonna lose... my fucking... shit.

I sighed and he said, "I didn't think so."

"She alright?"

_'Cause if she is... she's not gonna be for long._

"She's fine, dude."

There's a small part of me that's glad she's okay.

A big part.

A huge fucking part, okay?

Em continues to tell me what I really don't wanna fucking hear. "It' really no big deal, bro. A buddy called me and said he pulled her over for running a red light and I just thought I'd check because she gave him some story about babysitting for me... and not wanting you to know she ate at McDonald's."

He chuckles. "You on some kind of a health kick or something?"

I practice my Sutra breathing.

Or try to at least.

"He let her _off_?"

"Yep." I make a mental note to have a talk with Emmett's grunts about pulling my daughter over... and letting her _go_.

"So we don't know where she is."

"Shit. No, dude, sorry. I just assumed she'd be on her way home if not there already, by now."

"Don't worry about it, Em... that it?"

"Yeah, hey... you need any help?"

"Nope. I'll fill ya in later."

I end the call and take a nice, long, deep breath of polluted Washington DC air in before I go back to Jasper.

"You still locked in to that tracking software and is it up and current on Hanna's phone?"

"Affirmative two-fold, my friend.."

"Can you tell me where she is right now?" Swan is just watching this shit unfold and I can see it in her eyes that she's gettin' a little worried, so I smirk and wink at her to let her know everything's gonna be fine.

And believe me when I say... everything better be the fuck fine.

"Hold on, let me see..." Jazz tells me and I hear him typing into his computer with only a few pauses in between mumblings like, _"oh shit"_ and _"Hanna, Hanna, Hanna". _

"What?" _For the love of fucking God, he's killing me._

"Well, the last thing on her phone's safari history shows she Yahoo Mapped directions to Radio City Music Hall up in NYC. She's about a quarter of the way there now."

I'm scowling. I know I'm fucking scowling but I can't help it.

And screw the breathing.

"Any texts or anything?"

More typing, less mumblings. "Not since about six hours ago," he tells me and then rattles off a couple of phone numbers I recognize as friends of hers. "Sorry, dude."

"It's all good, Jazz, thanks man."

"You want some company on this?"

"No, I think Hanna and I need a little Daddy Daughter quality time, if ya know what I mean."

"Not really."

Of course he didn't.

"Alright, I gotta go, Jazz, thanks again."

"Edward?" Swan's following me as I head out the front door with my cell phone and keys in one hand, the Colt in the other, getting ready to stuff it into the back of my jeans.

What?

You never fucking know. This _is_ New York we're talking about, here.

"Don't even try talking me outta going, Swan."

"I wasn't, I just..."

She steps in front of me and I have to stop. The look in her eyes is telling me she doesn't want anything to happen to her little girl... or me and I really fucking hate it when Swan worries like that. So I force myself to take a beat... something I'd learned to do over the years, miraculously... and settle myself the fuck down for her.

I'm only flailing a little bit.

Honest.

"I'm not gonna do anything _rash_, Swan. I just wanna have a little _talk _with our _daughter _about the dangers of just... fucking taking off without anyone knowing where she is. For Christ's sake, the girl thinks she's..."

"Seventeen?" Swan asks as her fingers lift up to the sides of my head and run themselves through the ever so slightly greying hairs that are starting to show.

It's calming.

And yeah.

I know.

Trust me, every single motherfucking one of those grey hairs is courtesy of Hanna.

Swan's eyebrow raises up a little at me and she smiles, like she's reading my mind, reminding me silently of my _own _sneak outs and car borrowing and _I know way the fuck more than my parents do _moments.

By now, she knows most of the stories there are to be told. _Most of them_. It's one of the few _cons _to making up with my fuckery of a family... they never miss an opportunity to tell her about my and Emmett's "bad choices" over the years.

Unfortunately.

It's all fun and fucking games until your own _daughter _pulls that bullshit.

And it's all a really hard pill to swallow, but still...

"This is different... Bella, she's..." Jesus... my chest hurts when I even think about it. "I mean, shit... that's... fucking _Hanna _out there."

Swan tightens her smile and hugs the shit out of me before saying anything. Which is simply, "I know."

She makes me promise to keep her up to date as I slip into the only other fucking car we have left, and as I drive up the 395 toward New York, I do some Googling of my _own_. Like how to get into Radio City Music fucking Hall without a pass and whether or not an old friend of mine still works the stage door there or not.

And who exactly is attending this awards show that would cause Hanna to go to such an extreme measure and chance getting herself grounded for the rest of her fucking life?


	9. Chapter 9, LightBella

**A/N: This was tweaked up until it posted, so don't blame mistakes on SueBee Tassels, because she rocks hard. Many thanks to SereInNC and momof4 for pre-reading. And thank you all for reading!  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 9 - LightBella<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 8:20 EST**

Edward grips my hand like he's holding on for dear life as Sting ticks through my husband's accomplishments. He's tried to stay under the radar as he's produced up and coming talent, but that's harder these days when everyone knows everything as long as they're on Twitter and tune into TMZ. He could have gotten away with his secret musical do-gooding back in 1987. The fact that he can't now kind of kills him.

The fact that there's a camera in his face right now kills him.

The fact that Thea's sitting in the front row, about fifty yards away is killing him.

"I love you," I whisper in his ear as he shifts uncomfortably in his seat.

His face is projected onto the enormous screen that hangs above the stage. He can't look, though. His foot shakes nervously. He's going to crush my hand.

"... I'm so happy to present MTV's Lifetime Achievement award to my colleague and dear friend, Edward Cullen!"

The crowd goes wild and Edward's anxious eyes seek mine out. I take his face in my hands. "Congratulations, Sweetheart. Go." A quick kiss goes a long way to quieting his nerves.

"When I heard at the close of day," he murmurs, quoting the first line of our favorite poem to me. It's never been so appropriate.

Another kiss and he's up. He shakes hands and claps shoulders as he makes his way down the aisle. My heart bounces as he bounds up the steps and I can't help but chuckle as Sting embraces him in a bear hug. I remember that time over wine when Edward called the two of them "a couple of assholes".

"Sting's not an asshole," I'd replied. I'd thought I was so smart. So had Edward. Who would have thought that so many years later the feeling would still be mutual? No, I never would have dreamed that I would be sitting at the MTV Music Awards with Edward and my daughter. I never would have believed Thea would be gazing up at him onstage, awestruck, just like I had been when I was her age - just like I am tonight. Awestruck. Familiarity hasn't changed that. These days, though, it's his heart that takes my breath away more than anything else.

Edward tries to walk off the stage without a word, but his friend makes a show of trapping him at the podium. Sting's enjoying the spectacle. Edward, clearly, is not. I'm enjoying it, though. Butterflies do battle in my stomach. So many years later, seeing lights shining behind Edward's head and hearing the audience cheer, I feel like a girl again. I fall in love all over again. There's an internal flip-flop and a time jump and I might as well be sixteen - my heart hammering in my ears, my breath taken away. Decades later, I'm still in absolute awe of the man that shares my life. He's also that man that loves me unconditionally and waited decades for me to love him back. Reality hits me hard: I'm living out my wildest teenage dream.

"If it weren't for the amazing artists and musicians I've had the privilege of working with over the years, and without fans that were willing to listen, I wouldn't have been presented tonight with this... small astronaut," Edward mumbles into the mic, running his free hand through his messy head of hair. "And if it weren't for my step-daughter, I would never have even contemplated coming to New York this evening to receive it.

"So, I'd like to dedicate this award to the young lady right over there." Edward points toward Thea; my heart thumps and my eyes tear. "Enjoy the show, Little One. And, um, don't do anything your mother WOULD do."

With that, Sting claps Edward on the back and the two leave the stage. Cameras swarm in front of my daughter, whose squeal I'm quite certain I can make out amidst all the cheering and applause. My daughter's face flashes on the big screen over the stage before she hides behind her hands. Her dark brown curls tumble in front of her face. Cameras flash.

I get the distinct impression that my life has come full circle. In so many ways, my daughter is exactly where I was at sixteen. This time around, though, she has loving parents to watch out for her. She has years of parental advice and experience to draw on. She has the luxury of being a child. She's not being forced to grow up before her time. She has no reason to seek out a father figure and a lover rolled in one. I've given her what I should have had as a child.

I don't have much of a chance to reflect on any of that, though, because all at once every girl in the theater is charging past me, screaming at the top of their lungs. This is the real reason we're here tonight. Dustin Jeeber is about to go on.

I search for Thea, trying to spot her reaction, but she's no longer in her seat. She's lost in a jumping and screaming mass of girls that ring the stage in a tight semi-circle. Losing sight of her in this crowd would normally drive me insane, but I relax when I catch sight of her friend's security guard, Tyler. He assured me that he wouldn't lose track of my daughter. He had such an air of confidence, and such obvious love for Thea's friend, that I'm almost able to relax and enjoy the show.

This is my opportunity to try to figure out what Thea sees in this Jeeber guy. Personally, I think falling for Edward and The Masens back in the day was much more reasonable. Then again, I'm probably biased.


	10. Chapter 10, Pennyward

**A/N: Pay attention to the date and time. js **

**Thanks to Suebee for cleaning things up and to all of our prereaders who know the right things to say so we don't chicken out and pull this nonsense. And thanks as always to you guys for indulging us and reading along!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 10: PENNYWARD<strong>

**August 19th 10:15 PM PST**

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Faith, we're gonna need some money for greasing palms. Thea, you need to go shopping...think sexy.

**THEA_JEEBER212**: I was already thinking sexy, but what's the plan? And how are you gonna get here? Faith can get her dad to take her anywhere, but YOUR dad... ?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Got it covered girls. No worries. :)

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: We need to think this thru a little more, but I'll talk to my dad in the morning. Chat tomorrow same time?

**THEA_JEEBER212**: YES! Thank you both so much! If we make this happen, I will be so, so grateful! xoxo Night!

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: Good night! Be bad!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Hanna! How about trying to be good?

**HANNA_F_DA_POHPOH**: NEVER ;)

Faith logs off and I pinch the bridge of my nose. I have worried about her relationship with these older girls for good reason it seems.

I didn't want Isabella to ever know about my spying, but it appears I need to come clean if we are going to handle this situation appropriately. I email a copy of the Gchat to myself and grab my iPad on my way upstairs. Isabella isn't going to be happy with me or Faith. I pass my daughter's room on my way up. Her guilty conscience has been my best friend. I pop my head in, hoping she'll confess immediately.

"It's late. Lights out."

"Sorry," she mumbles reaching up and shutting off the light next to her bed.

I step in the room and kiss her forehead. "Love you."

"I love you, too. To the moon and back," she adds.

"Infinity times."

"Infinity times." She smiles, but I can see she's battling with that conscience. I hope it wins. For her sake and mine.

I slip back out, shutting her door behind me and check to make sure Alec is asleep. He's out, but his iPod is in his hand. I thought Isabella had grounded him from electronics after the incident with the dog. My son seemed to think it would be very funny to put the devil dog in the dryer. He swore he put it on no heat and just wanted to see if it could be a canine exercise wheel, but Isabella and Faith were up in arms. Although I thought it was a little funny, it was dangerous and not smart to do when his mother and sister were in the house.

He should have waited for a boys only day. I remove the banned device and put it in my pocket for safe keeping. I'm used to him being the one to worry us. Not his sister. Never my Pennylove.

I find Isabella reading in bed. I toss Alec's iPod beside her and set the iPad down so I can take off my shoes.

"Where did you get this?" she asks, picking it up and looking at it closely to make sure it is whose she thinks it is. "I had it hidden in the closet."

"Time to find a new hiding spot. Your son is more skilled at finding things than you give him credit for."

"That little..." She sits straight up and puts her book on the nightstand. She's pissed. "I'm tempted to give all his toys to the Children's Hospital. See how he likes that. He won't be able to sneak them back into his room then, will he?"

I chuckle. She's tough, but not that tough. She might make him give up a few things but never all. Plus she knows I'd get suckered into buying more. Saying no to the children is not my strong suit.

"I think Alec is the least of our problems."

"What did Cupcake do now?"

I shake my head. "Not Cupcake."

"Emmett?"

I shake my head again.

"Char?" Her eyes widen as if she's figured it all out. "She's dating someone, isn't she? Something is going on, I know it. Is that it?"

"It's not Charlotte," I say, intrigued by her thoughts, though. "Do you really think she's dating?"

Isabella nods. "I think it might be the guy from the market she gets the fish from. She's been smelling extra fishy lately."

She makes me laugh again. Charlotte and the Fishman. Yuck. I calm down and put on my serious face.

"It's Penny."

"What's Penny?"

"The problem."

My wife lies back, and it's her turn to laugh. I switch on the iPad and pull up the Gchat.

"Now before you lecture me on the importance of trust and respecting our children's privacy, blah, blah, blah, I want you to remember that if I hadn't been so diligent in keeping track of who our daughter talks to, we would not know about this." I hand her the iPad.

Her laughter quickly dies out. "Dirty old men? Without her mom?" She keeps reading. "Money for greasing palms? Think sexy?" Suddenly, I'm not feeling like a bad guy at all. Isabella shuts off the iPad. "Absolutely not. She is not going."

"What do we tell her? It's not like I can admit to her that I read all her Gchats and emails and texts and keep detailed logs of her phone calls. She might start picking up on things and realize I have a GPS chip in her phone and another one in the penny charm on her necklace."

"You do not," Isabella says with her mouth left agape.

"Beside the point," I say, waving a hand through the air like that will make everything I just confessed disappear. "Should we wait and see if she comes clean, tells us what the other girls are up to?"

My wife chews on her thumbnail. "I like that idea. I like the idea of her coming to us and telling us the truth. This is Faith we're talking about. She's not going to go through with some crazy plan to meet some ridiculous popstar. She'll cave and tell us. And if she doesn't tell us, she'll back out in the middle of it."

"We know the basics of the plan so we can stop it if she suddenly finds her rebellious streak. I can closely monitor her texts and chats until then as well. The girls will think they're getting away with murder, but we'll be one step ahead."

"You're awfully calm about this," Isabella notes, kissing me on the cheek.

I rub my hand up and down her thigh. She has no idea how much touching her centers me, especially when something like this smacks me in the face. I begin to climb on top of her because nothing really centers me like being inside of her. I kiss her deeply as I settle between her legs. "It's going to be fine. I'll bring Emmett with me."

"No," she says, pushing at me until I stop my assault on her neck. "Tyler. You will take Tyler." The idea alone calms her. She takes a deep breath. " There's no way he'll let Faith out of his sight for a second."

"Good idea," I say, going back to work on releasing some tension. I bite playfully on Isabella's earlobe and her hands slip under my shirt as she moans in appreciation. "There's no way in hell she'll be able to shake _him_."

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><p><strong>AN: You didn't think Pennyward would let anything go on without his knowledge, did ya? He's Edward fucking Masen, is he not?**


	11. Chapter 11, FaN Tyler

**A/N: *sigh* Tyler's up. He's kind of Trouble's favorite. **

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><p><strong>Chapter 11 - FaN TYLER<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 8:30 PM EST**

I'm too old for this shit. Too damn old. It's not even the noise; the earplugs take care of that. It's kids jumping around and nobody has any damn manners anymore. I swear, if one more sweaty teenager with a nose ring knocks into me, we're going to find out what happens when I hold them up in the air by that thing on their face.

Bella owes me big time. Emmett should have been given this job. He'd be enjoying this shit. Maybe they worried he'd be distracted by the flashing lights and the dancers on stage wearing nothing but their damn underpants. I don't think it would matter. Faith isn't going to do anything stupid; it's not in her nature. This is _Faith_ we're talking about. She's a rule follower almost to a fault. She's just like her mother - wants everyone to be happy and can't stand to disappoint, which is why I adore her as much as I do. Not to say there isn't a big chunk of Masen in there - because there is. No one is as competitive as Faith Masen. Sometimes I worry she's going to drive herself crazy trying to be the best at everything. The girl is a perfectionist like her father. Smartest in school, perfect attendance, was Student Council President in Jr. High, Spelling Bee champion six years running, volleyball star. She's involved in everything and loves every second of it. The girl is fourteen and knows four languages. Hell, she could probably teach her French class. I thought her father was driven, but I'd say she has him topped.

Driven, but a good girl, who never looks for trouble. She runs from trouble. In fact, every time Alec finds trouble, Faith runs...to one of us to tell on him. If I were here because Alec and his friends had concocted some idiotic plan, I'd be worried. He is the epitome of trouble, but I love him like he was my own. In fact, he's been mistaken as mine more times than I can count. Bella has encouraged a close relationship between us so Alec has someone who can relate to the challenges a black man faces in this world. He might be a Masen, but there are still some real assholes in this world who can't get past a person's color. Alec and I are tight, which makes me happy. Without children of my own, I suppose the two Masens are as close as I get.

I do understand why Bella and Mr. Masen worry, though. Faith is frighteningly smart but naive to the nth degree. We've sheltered that child from most of the evils in the world. Unfortunately, the big bad world will show its true colors to her eventually. For now, Faith and her little friend are in the front row, swooning over some manchild who thinks it's still 2012. These popstars never want to grow up. Unlike that guy from The Masens. He has aged gracefully. He dresses like he knows how old he is and isn't ashamed. He speaks like a grown ass man. No "yo yo yo" or "dude". His acceptance speech was very nice.

All right, I may be a fan. Maybe Faith can get a picture of me and him on my phone. Shit, I sound totally gay. I shake my head. Nah, it's _not_ gay. Guys can be fans of other guys. That is not gay.

My eyes stay focused on my responsibility. Faith and her friend will not leave my sight. I promised Bella. She made me say it. Out loud. _I will not let Faith out of my sight._ The things I do for that woman. We've got about an hour to go, then we can get the hell out of here and back to the hotel. I can survive without losing my temper, I'm sure of it. Until someone steps on my foot. Twice. Three times. Without looking down and to my left where the offending foot stomper is, I shove him or her away with my hand. Personal space.

"Hey! First you step on my foot and then you shove me? Asshole."

I ignore because I can. The earplugs help.

"Do you know how much my father paid for these shoes? And helloooooo... I'm a three time ballet prima donna, dude... I go to Julliard. He's totally gonna sue your ass for breaking my pinky toe... I really think you broke my pinky toe."

She's touching me. Probably punching me with her tiny, teenage, prima donna fists as if she could hurt me. She can't hurt me. She can piss me off, though.

"No one can see over your big head, and what are you even doing here? This area's just for kids. What are you, some kinda pervert or somethin'?"

Faith and her friend are jumping and singing along. Their eyes are focused on one thing, and they aren't going anywhere until he's off stage. I look down at the bane of my existence.

_Man, I hope she's got a nose ring..._

"Stop touching my boob, you freaking molester! Dude, I'm calling security... SECURITY!"

I take a deep breath and bend down so we're face to face. "Enough," I say as clearly as possible.

"Enough? I'm not even close, pal, do you know how many years they put perverts away for these days?"

I'm looking at this insane girl for a good half a minute when I realize there's something familiar about her. Something very familiar. I pop back up and scan the area for Faith and Thea. _Son of a..._

I turn back to the little shit who played me. Like a fucking fiddle. Like the world class fiddler she is. But she's gone. And Mr. Masen is going to blow like a goddamn landmine. Our baby is growing up and hanging out with the wrong people. Someone is going to answer to me and then her father.

And the one from DC? She's mine too.


	12. Chapter 12, Faith

**A/N: Um...Trouble, again. You're all probably tired of me by now. LOL. Thanks to Suebee for her betafairy skills and awesome pictures of Adam Levine. He's way hotter than Dustin Jeeber IMHO. To our prereaders and to BDC and Jo for being so much fun to write with - THANKS! And to you readers - we love you. **

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><p><strong>Chapter 12 - FAITH<br>**

**Sunday September 9th, 9:00PM EST**

I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead. I'm so dead.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! This is totally going to work! You guys are the best friends I could ever ask for!" Thea is practically bursting with joy. Seeing one of your best friends this happy makes the guilt easier to stomach. I have to keep telling myself that it's worth the risk to see her like this.

Tyler won't really kill me. I've seen him mad before, just not at me of course. Like the time Mom wandered away from him when we were visiting some refugee camp in Kenya and he couldn't find her for like a half hour. He's never been madder than when he found her in a tent with a mother and her sick baby. He forgave her because she was helping someone in need. He didn't talk to her for a whole day, but he forgave her. I don't know exactly what Daddy had to say about it, but it probably wasn't good. She talked to him on the phone and kept saying things like, "calm down" and "don't overreact". Now when we travel to places like that, Daddy always sends one guard per person. I'm going to have a 24/7 guard after this, I just know it.

"We need to get into his dressing room. We want Thea to be able to talk to him without all his entourage around," Hanna says, coming up from behind. She made it. Tyler is going to be so pissed.

The three of us walk down one of the busy hallways. I swear we pass by Bo Janus. Even Hanna does a double take. I hear he's thinking about going solo. That would be a shame. As much as my brother annoys me, brothers are still important.

"Faith." Hanna holds out her hand. "Money." _Greasing palms. _ I forgot. I pull out the hundred dollar bills I stuffed in my back pocket. Hanna's eyes go wide and then she shakes her head. "To be you for a day."

I don't know what that means. All I know is I don't even want to be me right now because this is killing me. Hanna stays herself, _thank God_, and goes up to some younger guy with a headset and the same pass around his neck that we have. They whisper back and forth and he points down the hall where the crowd has definitely thinned out. She gives him one of the bills and a wink. He smiles and watches her as she walks back towards us, kind of shimmying her hips. How does she do that?I would just look like a spaz. Maybe when I'm seventeen I'll figure it out.

"This way to Casa Jeeber," Hanna says with a smirk.

We move further down the hall and we can hear the crowd screaming louder because Dustin must be finished. Hanna stops in front of the door with a sign that says D. Jeeber on it and tries to turn the doorknob.

"It's locked?" Thea looks completely devastated as we each take a turn jiggling the handle like that will magically make it open. Maybe this is good. Maybe I should just go back and tell Tyler we want to meet Dustin and go get Daddy so he can help. Daddy would help if I asked him. Why didn't I just ask Daddy?

"No worries, girls," Hanna assures us. With a sweep of her hands, she gets us to move out of her way and pulls something out of her back pocket. She fiddles with the door handle for less than five seconds before the thing opens up for her. No lie. The girl has some scary talents. Hanna and Alec would get along so well. She'd teach him things that would make Mom's head spin.

We waste no time falling into Dustin's room, shutting the door behind us. _Oh my God, we are in Dustin Jeeber's dressing room. _ My guilty conscience takes a backseat to my internal squeeing teenager for a second.

"We did it!" Thea says in a burst of nervous laughter.

"Hanna did it." I can give credit where credit is due.

"_We_ did it," Hanna corrects me. "We're like the trifecta of awesomeness."

We did do this. My guilt is back behind the wheel. We just bribed a man to tell us where Dustin's private dressing room was and broke in. We have committed two crimes. Not only is Tyler never going to talk to me again, Daddy is going to be so disappointed, Mom is going to ground me for the rest of my life, and now I'm going to go to jail.

Thea and Hanna are talking about what she should say when he walks in and how Hanna and I will slip out when the fireworks start.

_I can't do this._

"What?" Hanna and Thea say at the same time. I must have said it out loud.

"I can't do this. I should have just asked my dad to get us back here. He would have if I begged enough. He never says no to me. Ever. He does freak out when I go missing, though. He loses it! I need to go get Tyler before he shuts this whole place down to find me."

Hanna grabs my flailing arms. "Faith. Please _chill. _ We're already back here, no harm, no foul... and FYI, your dad would have _never _let us back here if he knew we wanted to hook Thea up with some old dude."

"He's not _that _old," Thea grumbles, but I'm not paying attention.

There's no chilling, just freaking. "I'm not like you two. I'm not brave. I usually spend an exorbitant amount of time thinking about the consequences of my actions."

"Faith, you are totally brave. You came back here, didn't you? And you brought..." she looks at the hundred dollar bills I'd given her "...stupid amounts of stolen money with you to boot. You are-"

"I didn't steal anything," I interrupt. "Daddy gives me money if I ask for it, as long as I don't tell Mom, which I usually do because I feel guilty about it afterwards."

"Of course you didn't steal it." Hanna's shaking her head again like when I handed the money to her in the first place. "This is probably your weekly allowance. Did I mention how much I'd like to be you for just one day? Man..."

Again, I cannot understand why anyone would want to be me. I am a complete mess. "I should have thought this through. I should have stayed out there while you two snuck back here alone. I have to go find Tyler."

Hanna puts a hand on my shoulder and looks me straight in the eye. "Sometimes ya just gotta take the bull by the horns instead of thinking shit through all the time. The best things in life are made up of moments you didn't think through. Just this once, live a little, Faith."

I love Hanna. I love that she lives life without fear. I wish that could be me sometimes, but then I wouldn't be being true to myself. Faith Elizabeth Masen is her father's Pennylove. She follows the rules and she's really good at it. She makes her parents and her grandparents and her aunts and uncles and her bodyguards and her Lala proud.

"This is Thea's moment. Making Tyler and Daddy worry makes me feel terrible no matter how exciting this is. I promise to give you plenty of time to make this love connection happen."

"Just stay until Dustin gets here," Thea begs.

I shake my head. "If I don't go now, my father will have no qualms about taking the mic from whoever is on stage and announcing in front to all of Radio City Music Hall that his daughter is missing. Then your mother will know something is wrong and everything will be ruined." I pull Thea into the biggest hug. "He's going to love you."

"You're the bravest and don't even know it," she whispers in my ear.

"Try and give me a head start before bringing the big guy back here, will ya?" Hanna asks. "He might be a little more than annoyed with me right now." She looks nervous for the first time all night. I hug her too, even though she's less of a hugger than me and Thea.

"He won't hold a grudge when he knows you were trying to help a friend. That's what you do better than anyone I know."

She smiles and I'm out the door, trying not to faint when I pass by Dustin Jeeber and his entourage in the hall.


	13. Chapter 13, Thea

**A/N: Either there is deep symbolic meaning to the fact that all the parents are named Bella and Edward, or this is just a lighthearted story with characters we know & love & can't quite let go of. We'll let you decide. Either way, many, many thanks for taking the ride with us!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 13 - THEA<strong>  
><strong>Sunday September 9th, 9:15PM EST<strong>

Things are NOT going as planned. Faith left. Without her it feels like anything could go wrong at any minute. Like maybe Hanna will decide to leave, or Dustin won't come, or -

"What if she finds Tyler, like, immediately, Hanna? What if he gets here before Dustin? What if he gets here when I'm with Dustin? What if Dustin never has the chance to really get to know me, and this is my only opportunity ever, and now everything will be ruined?"

"Thea, calm down!" Hanna commands, taking me by the shoulders and shaking just a little.

I was being totally honest when I told Faith she was the bravest, because I am not brave at all. I'm so close to my goal and I'm so scared and I. Am. _Freaking_. Out.

"And now I'm going to be so scared the whole time he's here. And if they find us before I can talk to him, then he'll never fall in love with me and Edward and my mom are going to be SO angry. He just told me to be good in front of, like, fifty million people and if we're not even in love, then I don't even have an excuse, and why did she go?"

"Dude! You've got to stop talking for, like, one second and calm down. Faith is doing what Faith has to do. Now it's time for you to do what _you_ have to do."

"What do I have to do?" I wonder out loud.

I hear the door click open behind me and there's a rush of noise from down the hall. Hanna glances over my shoulder before turning me around.

"Does that help you remember?" she whispers in my ear.

I can't answer because it's like all the air has disappeared from my lungs and I'm choking – on love.

It's him.

It's hard to tell because the lights from the hallway are blazing behind him, casting his face in shadow, but making his silhouette glow. I would know him anywhere though. He takes another step into the room and squints down at me.

"Dustin!" I gasp.

It's hard to believe that it's even possible, but he's hotter in person.

"What the hell?" he asks, looking from me to Hanna and back. His talking voice is deeper than his singing voice and takes me by surprise.

"Um, Dustin?" I try again, taking a shaky step forward. "Um, hi!" I try waving, but my hand's not working right and I'm afraid it looks like I have a tick like the boy in my math class.

"Are you or are you not, Dustin Jeeber?" Hanna demands, taking her spot by my side.

"You know it." Dustin straightens his collar and looks to see if there's anybody around besides Hanna and me. I shiver all over.

"I'm, um, Thea," I manage in a small voice. "Thea Cl-"

Dustin's big, bright blue eyes finally settle on me and only me, and I can no longer speak. I can hardly stand. I clutch Hanna for support.

"Thea Clearw -" I try again.

"Nice," he says, silencing me again, nodding his head.

Dustin takes a step closer and he's just as tall as I thought he would be. His hair is hanging in his eyes and he's kind of sweaty and his shirt's sticking to his chest, and his baggy pants hang lower than my mom would approve of. Oh. My. God. He's wearing Calvins. I know Dustin Jeeber wears Calvins.

He takes another step and I'm frozen to the spot. He's close enough so we could almost touch if we wanted to. The thought actually frightens me, because if we touched I might just faint.

I try to smile and look mature at the same time. I try to keep the connection alive between us, because then he'll know how I feel, and maybe, just maybe, he'll feel it too. Oh god, he_ has_ to feel it too!

I gaze up at him, but he keeps glancing at Hanna. Maybe Dustin and me should be alone. Maybe he's self-conscious with someone else around.

"You were amazing tonight," I explain. "And I had to just… be here."

"Nice," he says again. "Chaz must've let you girls in, right?"

"Not unless this hairpin's name is -"

"He _definitely_ let us in," I interrupt, trying to push Hanna behind me, even though it's really hard to push Hanna anywhere. But we've gotten this far. If some guy named Chaz had to let us in so that we won't get in trouble, so be it.

"Nice," Dustin says again, licking his lips. He must be thirsty after his performance. He must think everything's really... nice. "And you guys are -"

"Eighteen," Hanna says.

I personally wasn't planning on lying. Mom never lied to Edward about her age and Edward loved her anyway. How can Dustin and I build a relationship on one big lie?

It's hard to concentrate on all of that, though, because Dustin does this raised eyebrow thing in Hanna's direction, then strides across the room and pulls his sweaty shirt over his head and I am really going to die. He is not wearing a shirt, at all. This is way more intense than I thought it was going to be. I mean, he's not wearing a shirt. I know. I already said that, but, like, oh my god.

After that, Dustin grabs a beer from a tub of ice and dangles it in front of Hanna and me. I can't believe he thinks I might even look older than eighteen, like twenty-one.

Hanna coughs and raises an eyebrow.

"I don't drink," I admit, determined not to lie again.

"Whatever."

He takes a big, long swig, and I get to watch his chest and his arms and his flat stomach and I really, really didn't think it would be exactly like this.

"Maybe you should go," I whisper to Hanna.

"Yeah, and maybe you're completely and one hundred percent off your rocker," she whispers back.

I might be a little relieved.

Dustin turns around and faces the both of us with this half-smile on his face. My heart starts beating a mile a minute. Hanna makes a retching noise and I'd kick her if I didn't need both feet underneath me to stay upright.

"Who's first?" he asks. He's got his hands on his belt buckle.

"What?" Hanna and I ask together.

"You," he says, nodding at me.

"Thea," Hanna and I say together. We have a way of saying exactly the same thing at the same time - sometimes.

"Cute name."

My heart hammers in my chest.

"Cute tits."

"_What_?" Hanna asks.

"Let's see what you've got, Tia," he says, and he's unbuckling his belt, and unbuttoning his jeans and –

"And your friend can help out if she wants. Or she can just watch. That's cool too."

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><p><strong>AN: the Jeebs is a nasty mofo... JS**


	14. Chapter 14, Hanna

**A/N: Beta's and Pre-readers make our lives so much easier. THANK YOU GUYS. Co-Writers make this _so much_ fucking fun... BLESS YOU, ladies... **

**Hanna's "hands on" training pays off in 3... 2...  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 14: Hanna<strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 9:20PM EST**

"Are you fucking kidding me, douchewad?" Oh my God, I'm not exactly supposed to say the "F" word and my dad would totally and completely kill me if he ever heard me say it in front of him or my mom... but my adrenalin kicked in the minute this guy propositioned Thea and me and I'm thinking that in _this _particular circumstance, it's highly called for.

I scowl at Jeeber the dweeber. _Really_ hard.

I'm shocked.

I'm dumbfounded.

But mostly, I'm disgusted and really... _really _pissed off.

And _ewww!_

I point over at Thea, whose face is still bright red from being shown the fugliest penis of all time and whose jaw is still slack from the way he'd "offered" it up to us.

God, I wanna kill this guy so bad.

I wonder if Dad would be okay with that.

"Do you have _any _idea the _bullshit _this girl went through tonight to get here? To _sneak_ away from her family and widdle her way back here? To your stupid _shitty _dressing room? Just to tell you she _cares _about you? And then you, what?" I fling a hand at his weeny peeny. "You whip out what you'd like the rest of us to think is your _dick _- in an OFFERING of some sort to her? To _US_? Because..." then I just have to laugh. It wasn't funny, not by a long shot, but I just can't help myself. "...we should be _lucky _to _have _you or something?"

He goes to say something and I can see Thea backing herself toward a corner, tears welling up in her eyes, unable to process what this dill hole had just insinuated we do. She is probably trying to pretend this wasn't all happening in hopes that I'd just get her out of there, but it only fueled my fire because seeing her upset like that?

Not. _Cool_.

Especially from this jack off.

"Shut it!"

I stalk up to him, get _right _in his face, just like I've seen my dad do plenty of times when he's taking a bad guy down. And I tell the dickless wonder, under no uncertain terms, "You'd be lucky to _lick... _her _fucking _feet, shit head. You'd be lucky to even _know _her... and let me tell you a little something about you and your shrivelled up wanna be dick, down there..."

My eyes dip, but only for a second, I swear. I've never actually _seen_ a real live and in person penis before... but I'm pretty sure _the Jeebs' _isn't a very "good" one. It's tiny and shriveled looking and I'm finding myself silently ecstatic for Thea that he _didn't _have that whole, "love at first sight" thing with her because there is _no _way that thing would have satisfied her in the long run.

Not that I would know anything about that but you know, I read Cosmo.

"You're old, you're ugly, and you will never _ever _get a chance at someone as great as Thea. Ya know why? Because you're a has been. A has been with a crap attitude and probably no sperm count."

I am breathing... _so__ hard_ I think I might be having a heart attack._  
><em>

I hear Thea let out something that sounds like a laugh behind me and just when I think this guy might _maybe_ be smart enough to simply _shut up_ and let us leave with a smidgen of his dignity left, he smirks down at me.

Smirks!

"A has been with two teen-aged girls in his dressing room that aren't exactly acting like good little girls are supposed to, if you ask me."

He waggles his eyebrows at me and I'm seriously... _just _about to nut punch him for that when I hear a commotion going on out in the hallway.

Not gonna lie, I think about yelling for help even though I'm worried it's that Tyler dude, coming back to exact his revenge on me for that pervert comment I pulled with him earlier in the night. But before I can give it much more thought, the door opens and Faith's superhero fills the doorway.

Now it's my turn to smirk.

_Sayonara, Jeebs!_


	15. Chapter 15, Faith

**A/N: Getting closer to the end! Thanks to all the usual suspects. Can you believe Dustin was such an a-hole? Guess who else isn't going to believe it...**

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><p><strong>Chapter 15: Faith<strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 9:20PM EST**

I'll say we had to go to the bathroom. Apologize for not getting his attention. More lies. Can't do it. He'll know I'm lying anyway. He _always _knows. Tyler is like a human lie detector. I was helping a friend. A friend in need. He'll forgive me. After he gets over being mad. He's going to be so mad.

There seems to be a hundred more people backstage than there were a few minutes ago. I'm trying to weave my way through so I can get back out there and find Tyler or Daddy. Oh, Daddy. He's going to be so disappointed. He's going to make that face, that sad face, the one that he tries to hide but I see sometimes. Daddy's not good about losing things or almost losing things, even. Mom says it's because he had to learn about loss when he was young, when his mom died. I push past people a little more forcefully. I need to get found. _Now._

Just when I see the exit into the theater, a hand grips my arm and pulls me back.

"Never thought I'd see the day." Tyler doesn't look mad. He looks crushed. I realize that is a million times worse than mad.

I burst into tears. In spite of the sobbing, I try to explain myself. "I was coming to find you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for disappearing. We're trying to help Thea. She's in love with Dustin Jeeber and she knows that if he met her, he would feel the same way and Hanna said this was the perfect plan and I tried to go along with it and I gave her money so she could get us to his dressing room and then we still had to break in and I don't want to go to jail and I don't want Daddy to to be sad because I snuck back here and lost you on purpose. When I was back there, I realized I don't want to be lost, so I came to find you and here you are and you're so disappointed in me and you probably aren't going to talk to me for a whole day just like the time Mom disappeared on you in Kenya and you were so mad but you don't even look mad you just look like I'm the reason your heart hurts and that hurts _my_ heart and Mom is going to ground me for the rest of my life, isn't she?" I take a shaky breath and my face is wet from all my tears.

Tyler's expression has gone from devastated to dumbfounded. A tiny smile appears and he pulls me into a tight bear hug. "There's our girl."

I don't know why he's being nice to me, but I need it. I wrap my arms around his waist and totally get his shirt all messy with my tears and snot. "I'm sorry.

"I know, sweetheart. We knew you wouldn't be able to go through with it. Now, let's go get your friends and get you back out in the theater."

We walk back to the dressing room. The people move out of our way like Tyler is Moses parting The Red Sea. He must look like a man on a mission. I hope Thea has had enough time to make Dustin realize they are meant to be. If they are meant to be, it should have been, right?

Tyler's on his phone, talking to Daddy, I'm sure. "She came looking for me before I even had to look very far. She couldn't go through with it. I don't think we need to tell Bella anymore than that."

I smile because Tyler is probably more scared of Mom than Dad. Kind of like me. I totally vote for leaving this part out when we talk to Mom.

"We're going to get the other two. Yes sir. She's upset with herself, but she's fine. We'll be out in a few."

He hangs up just as we get to Dustin's dressing room door. Tyler walks right past some guy standing outside it.

"Sir, you can't go in there," he says even though he's moving out of Tyler's way. Tyler completely ignores him and opens the door without knocking. I would have knocked so Hanna had some warning and could have hid or something. The security guy raises his voice then takes off down the hall. I can't see around my extra large bodyguard, but I can hear Hanna. She sounds _pissed._

Tyler spins around so fast and pushes me back until I'm hitting the other side of the hallway. "Stay out here. _Don't_ move."

Like a blur, he charges into the room and slams the door shut behind him. Oh man, Hanna is dead. Everything happens so fast after that. I can hear Hanna shouting, and I think I hear Dustin squeak and maybe Tyler growl. Hanna shouts something about ripping off someone's dick and I'm mortified. Out of nowhere, some guy comes charging over and kicks the door down while pulling out a gun.

I'm frozen in my spot; I can't breathe. Tyler and my friends are going to die and it's all my fault. Half a dozen huge security officers come running down the hall, right for me. Before I can think to do anything, a hand grabs mine and pulls me into a dressing room across the hall.

"Shh, don't cry. You'll be safe here. I don't know what the heck is going on, but you'll be safe here, I promise."

I didn't even realize I was crying again. I wipe my eyes and look up at the person who saved me. Soft brown curls, big brown eyes, and the sweetest smile I have ever seen belong to no other than Nico Janus.

My hero.


	16. Chapter 16, The Dick

**A/N: You guys are so AWESOME for taking this trip with us! THANKS for reading! And thanks the "stage crew" for helping out with beta'ing and pre-reads!  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 16: The Dick <strong>

**September 9th, 9:20PM**

After I slip my old buddy a "Franklin"... _Which is coming right the fuck outta Hanna's allowance, by the goddamn way... _to let me in the back stage door to Radio City, I take a long, exasperated breath of air and let it out because fuck if this place isn't huge. I have no goddamn idea if I'm gonna find Hanna in here or not.

First of all, I have no clue as to_ why _she's even here, so I in turn have no _fucking _idea where to start looking.

_I'm gonna kill her._

_I'm gonna kill her and then I'm gonna fucking go to jail and then the Swan is gonna kill _me_._

Okay, maybe I'm not gonna kill her right off the bat.

First I'm gonna make sure she's not hooking up with some asshole pedi-fucking-phile who has somehow managed to talk my very mature, very too smart for her own good little girl into stealing her dad's car and meeting him here so he could, what..?

I don't even fucking wanna think about it, that's what.

_Correction, I'm gonna kill a fucking pedophile faster than he can whip his seventy-five year old dick out... THEN I'm gonna kill my daughter for giving me a goddamn heart attack._

Maneuvering through this place is crazy. There's a ridiculous amount of backstage fuckery goin' on and a shit load of people trying to get interviews with one of the famous who just won an award or something and I'm thinking he doesn't look too goddamn happy about the attention. Part of me wants to make a path for the guy and let him escape the crazy but I'm on a mission and I need to stay focused on one thing.

Hanna.

So I push past the reporters and keep my Colt in the back of my jeans so as not to attract any unwanted attention. It's working for a while, but when I round this one particular corner and hear the distinct sound of my daughter's voice behind this one particular dressing room door, I stop short.

"Rip his _dick _off!" she screams and every motherfucking fear of mine throughout her short 17 years of life has suddenly come rushing at me like a goddamn freight train.

I only vaguely remember noting the name on the door, wondering who in the mother of _fuck _D. Jeeber is, and feeling only slightly curious about the mob of people that's forming just yards from me, before I pull out the Colt and kick the door in.

I'm not sure who to point it at once I get in there, to be completely fucking honest here. I mean there was option A) the douchebag who was shirtless, pantless and standing _way_ too fucking close to my daughter as he flails his lightweight arms at some huge ass, larger than Mr. T. himself, motherfucker... who apparently was option B.

And one scary ass looking dude.

I'm thrown off my game for a few seconds wondering, _holy shit I wonder what this guy benches_, but then I remember what's goin' on around me and that's when I also catch a glimpse of who I vaguely recall as one of Hanna's friends, over to the side of all the action.

I'm back to angry and wave the Colt at _both _of the non-female gendered people in the room. "Step the fuck away from the under-aged girls, asshats."

"Drop your weapon sir!" someone shouts from behind me... out in the hallway, maybe and it's like I hear the words but they're not exactly registering, if ya know what I mean. I don't know where they came from and really don't fucking care, 'cause that's _my _seventeen year old trouble making little girl in there and if someone's gonna get dropped, it's gonna be the idiot who forgot to pull his fucking pants up before I got there.

Part of my brain is wondering how in the hell someone else was on to these guys already and the other part is trying to think of a way to wring at least one of their fucking necks before anyone else got close enough to stop me.

I mean, the big guy's probably twice my size, if not more, and I'd probably end up with a few broken bones, some crushed ribs even... but I think I can take him. Eventually. And anyway, it's not exactly important how many of my bones get excruciatingly pulverized by Mr. T to the tenth degree over there, it's getting Hanna and her friend away from danger.

Right?

I'm about to go for broke when my plan is blown to hell. 'Cause that's about when five or ten people tackle the shit out of me and all I remember seeing before I'm knocked the fuck out is Hanna's shell shocked face looking down at me. Her hand flies to cover her mouth and keep it from sayin' anything she might regret and her eyes go wide with the fear of knowing that when this was all over, she's fucking grounded for ten lifetimes.

More if I have anything to fucking say about it.


	17. Chapter 17, Lightward

**A/N: Thank you guys so freakin' much for reading. Much love to the tricycle pit crew that helps make sure these chapters are good to go, so the tricycle can pedal on for another lap...  
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><p><strong>Chapter 17: Lightward <strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 9:25PM **

Press lines are tedious at the best of times. This is _not_ the best of times. This is a ridiculous parade led by kids dressed like Disney versions of rock stars - kids who don't have the faintest idea who I might be, but have done their homework and ask me inane questions with hopeful looks on their faces.

"Who are you wearing?"

I barely manage to keep a straight face. I hardly have the will to give her the time of day.

"I wear what's in my closet."

"Black?"

I shrug.

"Do you wear black on the outside because black is how you feel on the inside?"

Shit. See? They've fucking pulled a line from a song I wrote in '85. The kid smiles proudly.

"Are you a watered-down version of Mick Jagger in pink platforms - on the inside?" I ask.

"Um."

I move down the line. The less I say out loud, the more dignified I appear. I say precious little in public these days, but this evening could be the end of all that. Dignity be damned, I'm at the end of my tether. I've lived long enough to know what's meaningful to me, and it has nothing to do with the ten pound piece of metal that I hold in my hands.

It's been some time since I've really snapped. I almost like the idea of it and find myself ginning as I imagine what all of these fucktards would do if I really lost my shit.

This is supposed to be a special night for Thea, though, so I endure. I will myself to think of the precious pieces of my life in order to keep centered and maintain my track record of decency. I try a smile. I mumble something about a band I first discovered in '07 that recently won a Grammy. I nod pleasantly. And I almost get knocked down by a security guard charging through the press area.

The intrepid reporter I'm speaking with presses on with my interview, but after five or six more people bolt past us, even he gives up. Thank fucking god, this tedium might just be over.

"I'd appreciate it if everyone would calmly move toward the back exit," a very large, very loud man suggests while he listens to his earpiece. There's muffled shouting and sounds of a scuffle in a hallway.

My phone buzzes in my pocket.

_We're being evacuated and I can't find Thea._

I'm immediately on the phone with Bella.

_"She was watching that Jeeber guy onstage and I lost sight of her in the crowd. She won't answer her phone, Edward, and not one of these assholes will listen to me!"  
><em>

"Bella, calm down."

_"I can't calm down, Edward! I can't find my daughter and they say someone has a gun."_

"I'm backstage. I'll work my way up front and make sure she got out."_  
><em>

I push against the crowd, trying to make my way toward the auditorium. I'm sure Thea's safe. She's probably just made it past her mom, somehow. She _has_ to be fine. Even as I convince myself of this, I pick up the pace so that I'm practically running down a narrow hallway. There's yelling and more security personnel that try to block me from proceeding.

"We need to clear this area, Sir."

"And I need to find my daughter."

"Sir, you have to turn around and meet your child -"

Things happen at once. An mountain of a man is marched quickly past in cuffs, surrounded by a swarm of security. I catch a flash of his face as he's led away and instantly recognize Thea's friend's security guard - the one that assured Bella and me that he would be watching Thea the entire time. My stomach drops to the floor. Something is very wrong.

I shove the asshole that's barring my way up against the nearest wall. He grabs a hold of my wrist with one hand and his intercom with the other, but there's no way he's gong to hold me back. I shake him off and push my way through the crowd. There's more security pouring out of a room and a bloody topless kid being loaded onto a stretcher. It's Jeeber. Holy fuck. If he did anything to Thea I'll tear his dick off and make him eat it. By the looks of it, though, someone's beaten me to it.

Finally, I catch site of purple leather and sparkly black lycra in the mob.

"Thea!"

"Sir, I'm sorry, but -" More men have joined the little asshole that's been nipping at my heels. I elbow and kick.

The girl in purple looks up when she hears the commotion and my heart drops through my chest. Thea's face is tear-stained and her eyes are red. Her body's in one piece, but I can tell that something inside hasn't been as lucky.

"Thea!"

"Sir, please, if you'd just -"

With a final shove I manage to shake the security trio that they've sic'ed on my ass. They go down in pile of idiocy like Moe, Larry and Curly. Luckily, most of the other people present are focused on yet another guy in cuffs that's being dragged past. I can't even imagine... I don't want to imagine, but Thea's quietly sobbing and there's no time to entertain horrifying scenarios. I dodge and weave and push until she's in my arms, her head pressed against my chest. Her hands holding on tight.

"I'm so stupid, I'm so stupid, I'm so stupid."

"Thea, shhh." I rock in the middle of chaos. "Shh."

I don't know what's happened. I'm so afraid of what could have happened. Now's not the time for asking questions, though. Now's the time for holding.

"Oh my god." She clings to me. "I'm so -"

"Shh."

She's crying. She's shaking.

"Thea, baby, it's going to be all right."

Moe, Larry and Curly glare at me from the periphery. They're lucky I have my hands full.

"Excuse me, Sir?" a different officer asks. "Is this your daughter?"

He looks the two of us over. There's really no doubt.

"Sir, we need you and your daughter to stay right here. We're going to need her for questioning."

Questioning? Fuck.


	18. Chapter 18, Pennyward

**A/N: Oh man it's all crazy now. We got guns and cops and crying girls all over the damn place. Thanks to Team Tricycle. Thanks for reading. We love that some of you are pleasantly surprised this is kind of a real story. LOL! Pennyward is up...**

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><p><strong>Chapter 18: FaN Edward<br>**

**Sunday September 9th, 9:30 PM EST**

"We need everyone to calmly make their way to the exits. Please don't push." The man on the stage is some idiot stage manager from MTV. For some reason he thinks telling a theater full of self-important celebrities and hyped-up teenagers to calmly leave when someone has already run out shouting there's someone with a gun is going to work. It's almost humorous. If my daughter wasn't back there with the gunman, I might be laughing right now. But she is. Because she decided today was a good day to try being a normal teenager.

I pull out my phone and push my way past the few people who are still near the front of the stage. Faith's penny charm tells me she's still in the building, but offers no other information. It's mass chaos behind me and even more of a fracas when I get backstage. I figure if I move in the direction everyone is running from, I'll eventually find my daughter and Tyler. No doubt this master plan of hers is the reason for this madness. At least we knew most of the plan. I just though we'd stop it before they actually got anywhere near the man's dressing room. Maybe I played this all a little too cool. That'll teach me to be so relaxed and easy going about things. Years of therapy _wasted_.

I dial Tyler, but he's not answering, so I call Faith who picks up on the third ring.

"Daddy?"

"Please tell me Tyler did not have to pull out a gun to get your friends to come back to your seats."

She's crying while trying to talk. It kills me when she cries. It's worse than when her mother does it. "We came to get Thea and Hanna out of Dustin's dressing room, but Tyler saw something and wouldn't let me in. Then some guy came and kicked the door down and he pulled out his gun. His _gun_, Daddy! They were all yelling in there and then the security guys came and then Nico saved my life because they were going to trample me. I'm sorry Daddy. I am so sorry. If anything happens to Tyler, I will never forgive myself. Ever!" She's completely hysterical. And I need to know who the hell Nico is.

"Where are you, Pennylove? Tell me where you are so I can see that you're all right with my own eyes."

She sniffs and I can hear someone in the background begging her not to cry and offering her a Kleenex.

"Thank you," she says to the tissue-offerer.

"Faith Elizabeth, where the hell are you?" I don't mean to be gruff with her, but I am at the end of my fucking rope here.

A swarm of men come out one of the doors, and in the middle of them is a handcuffed Tyler. Great. Something tells me this is going to cost me a small fortune and be somewhat of a public relations nightmare.

"Where the fuck is Faith?" I ask him as they cart him away.

Before he can answer, I hear her further down the hall, "Daddy?"

There she is alive and well. I move quickly, my legs carrying me over to her in a few strides. She's in my arms and sobbing again. I squeeze her tightly. This child will be the death of me. I have two of them. Two bleeding hearts, who put themselves at risk for those they love without thinking about their own well-being. She would never have done this if it hadn't meant so much to her friend. She's usually too smart for this kind of nonsense.

"This is quite a mess, Pennylove."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!"

There's so much commotion in the hallway as another man is dragged out of the room in handcuffs. The two girls come out behind them. Faith's friends almost look worse than Faith at the moment. I push my daughter back into the room from which she came. Three boys jump back, apparently startled a bit. I'm guessing one of them is named Nico.

"I love you," I tell my daughter, "but I am not happy with what has gone on here, and I know I don't know the half of it yet."

"Is Tyler okay?" she says with a hiccup.

"Seems he's been arrested, but he's fine." I shake my head. "We had hoped to tell your mother as little as possible, but now... You know how she feels about Tyler. Getting yourself into a situation that causes him to get arrested pretty much guarantees severe punishment."

"I came to find him so we would stay out of trouble! We were suppose to get the girls and go. He pushed me out. I don't know what happened. I swear."

"I'll tell you what happened." One of Faith's friends comes strolling in with an officer behind her. "Dustin Jeeber is a sicko who likes having his tiny dick sucked by girls he thinks are eighteen. And that superhero bodyguard of yours kicked his fucking pervy ass."

Penny gasps.

_Landmine._


	19. Chapter 19, The Swan

**A/N: Have we told you lately that we love you? Because we do. And we cannot thank you enough for playing with us in this sand box. It's fun, right? Okay, The Swan wanted a word... or two. **

**LOVE!  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 19: Swan<strong>

**September 9th, 9:40PM EST**

_Tacos tomorrow? Or spaghetti._

_Hmmmmm... _

I remind myself that Hanna _really_ likes tacos. It's her absolute favorite, so... spaghetti it is.

I freely admit that I might still be a little angry over my one and only daughter's latest escapade as I'm putting my 9PM nervous grocery shopping run things away. I'm desperately attempting to _not _ worry too much about whatever she's gotten herself into this time, when the news interrupts a show I've got playing in the background to fill the silence in the house.

Without it, I think too much.

Like about how I'm convinced Edward is going to have a heart attack before he's sixty. And how much I know Hanna breaks his heart by doing the same crazy things he used to when he was younger. I give him a hard time about it but I know it's different when it's your own child putting themselves at risk like she does. It's especially different when it's your daughter... your one and only daughter... and when you're the type of man who, on the outside, might be a hard core, ass kicking, sarcastic sonofabitch, but on the inside, your heart is one of the softest out there.

_She'll be fine,_ I tell myself. _ Edward's on his way, he'll take care of whatever it is and bring her home safe. _

_He'll be fine, too... _

_Everyone will be fine._

_Then I'm going to kill my daughter.  
><em>

"This just in," the reporter on the news says, pulling me out of my thoughts, as a picture of what looks like a frantic mob pops up... just outside... Radio City Music Hall... _crap._

I quickly change the channel to MTV because I know of all the people in the world, that crazy secret reporter guy Josh from there will tell me more than Chanel Six News. Hanna always gets her inside scoops from that guy. He has to already be on the scene if the other news stations are reporting on whatever was going on.

And I'm right.

I abandon the groceries altogether and sit to watch what the man in a hallway is saying as people all around him hustle and bustle. Then I take note of the details filling the television screen behind Josh.

Police uniforms, guiding people away from the area they're trying to seal off, a few celebrities who seem to be panicked and a couple of medic looking types who are rolling someone out on a stretcher, maneuvering their way through the sea of people and security guards that attempt to make a path for them.

"Okay," he whispers into his mic, trying to remain inconspicuous. "I'm roughly five feet from the alleged armed and dangerous perpetrator who attacked Dustin Jeeber just minutes ago."

_Oh no._

I'm getting a bad feeling about the situation already and I reach for my cell phone while stretching my neck and narrowing my eyes to see what's happening over Josh's shoulder, but the cameraman doesn't have a good enough angle for me to see much.

I text Hanna.

_Tell me the armed man at Radio City they're talking about on MTV is not your father._

"Looks like a real whack job to me, folks. It took seven security guards for Radio City plus one of the award winners' personal security detail to take this guy down."

"MOVE!" I yell at him as the camera jiggles around and teases me with quick shots of what's happening, but all I can really see is a huge huddle of nothing but suits and civilians.

Then it happens.

Josh makes some comment about them taking the suspect away in handcuffs and moves out of the way so that a clean shot can be filmed.

And oh, what a clean shot it is.

My jaw drops.

My heart might have stopped beating too, recognizing the look on Edward's face as he passes by the camera.

_Oh. He is not happy._

My eyes stay glued to the TV as long as I can take it... which is just until Edward is no longer in the shot... and then I text Hanna again, who I'm guessing _probably_ isn't too far away from the scene that had just played out in front of me.

_Enjoy your last night of freedom, missy. Because you are so grounded when you get home._

She doesn't text back and I don't expect her to either.

I also don't expect the next day to be a very spaghetti kind of day after all.


	20. Chapter 20, Faith

**A/N: The wheels are almost falling off this tricycle ride. Thanks to all who helped make this readable. Suebee is superb as beta. Our prereaders make us smile. Jo and BDC are the bestest. And you guys make our day by reading. xoxo**

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><p><strong>Chapter 20: FAITH <strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 10:30PM EST**

The police have us all in The Janus Brothers' dressing room. Me, Thea, Hanna, Thea's parents, my dad, and a bunch of security and police officers are all spread out around the fairly large space. Thea's parents are currently talking to the detective in charge. Daddy's talking to someone else. He's rolling his eyes and explaining for the hundredth time why Tyler was back here with me. He yelled so much at one officer that now the chief or sergeant or somebody is the only one allowed to talk to him. Daddy was _not_ happy about what Dustin did in front of my friends. I thought his head of going to explode when Hanna told us what happened. He looks calmer and his face isn't as red. All I know is I never want to make him that mad ever again.

My mom has texted me about a million times. Dad wasn't kidding when he said she was going to freak out because Tyler got arrested. Something tells me her face was as red as Daddy's. I'll be lucky if I ever get in her good graces again. I keep texting that I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem to be doing me any good. I think Hanna's mom has been watching MTV and texting her, too. I see her check her phone every couple minutes like me. Hanna doesn't text back, though. I think she's too afraid of making her mom even angrier. She said something about silence being golden. I'm also getting texts from Nico, who's sitting across the room smiling at me right this very second. We exchanged numbers before we got questioned by the police.

I try to act normal under his gaze, but it's not working. All I can think is _oh my God he is so cute!_ I look away because I don't want him to see how freaking red my cheeks are right now. It's so embarrassing to blush this much. My phone buzzes in my hand.

_You are so adorable when you blush._

Oh my God, he can read my mind! I think I'm going to die. I turn my head and look at Thea. Suddenly, I feel like the world's worst friend. Poor Thea looks absolutely crestfallen. Dustin Jeeber turned out to be a very bad man. One of the worst. He seemed so nice on the television and in the interviews we watched on YouTube. It just doesn't make sense.

"I love you, you know that, right?" I reach over and grab her hand, interlacing our fingers.

She nods but still looks sad.

Hanna finally comes out of whatever trance she's been in and speaks. "It was a stupid idea. I'm really sorry guys, especially to you, Thea. That guy was such a dick."

"No, _I'm_ sorry. It was my idea. It was my stupid, dumb, ridiculous idea," Thea chastises herself.

"None of us thought he would be so gross," I remind them.

"I knew he was gross, just not that gross," Hanna quips.

"Let's never talk about him again. Please, you guys." Thea looks like she's going to cry again. I see her stepdad glancing in our direction. He looks almost as heartbroken as she does.

"I don't suppose I can come live with one of you, can I?" Hanna asks after we all take a moment of silence.

I try to ease her mind. "Your parents are going to forgive you, Hanna. All parents forgive their kids _eventually_."

"I don't know, Faith. I think my dad's gonna kill me. He's probably gonna kick me out of the house and tell me I'm not welcome there anymore. Or better yet, he'll put me in jail, just like he does with all the _other _criminals he takes down."

"Oh my gosh, stop being so melodramatic," Thea says, grabbing Hanna's hand with her free one. Sitting between us, she links us all together. The Trifecta of Awesomeness. Well, we were kind of awesome. For a second there. Then we were sort of The Trifecta of Insanity. Hanna's dad and Tyler were arrested. Dustin Jeeber went to the hospital because Tyler broke his face and maybe his private parts. I think Dustin might be getting arrested, too, for pulling his pants down in front of my friends. I shudder at the thought. That is so gross.

Who wants to see a guy's you know what? Especially when you aren't even married! Eww.

My phone buzzes again. It's Nico. Again. I blush. Again.

_My brother thinks your friend is cute. The one in the middle. Calvin says a girl that pretty should never look so sad. _

Aww. His brother is so sweet. I show my phone to Thea. "Someone thinks you're pretty."

She reads the text and then raises her eyes to the boys across the room. This time it's Calvin who's blushing. Oh my God, he is so cute!

"Nico and his brothers totally saved me today. There are real gentlemen in this world, ladies. Let's not forget."

"I think I kinda like the middle one," Hanna admits.

"Bo?" I giggle. He is kind of cute. A little too old for me. I mean, he's like a few months away from eighteen. My mother would totally have a fit. Nico is fifteen and totally perfect in every possible way.

"You know they wear purity rings, right, Hanna?" Thea whispers, smirking. It's as close to smiling as she's gotten since the whole incident.

"Purity ring, my ass," Hanna says with a snort.

"Don't even think about corrupting them. I swear I will let Tyler take you down." I nudge Thea so she pushes into Hanna on the other side. Hanna nudges back, making me laugh.

My phone buzzes again. Unfortunately, it's my mom.

_Just pulled out some clothes from your closet that you will be donating to Goodwill in _exchange for Tyler's bail money. Sending pictures..._ _

My phone buzzes again and there's a picture of my bed and it's covered in clothes. I can see my brand new boots on top of the pile. UGH!

"I helped take care of the horses for a month to earn those boots!"

"What?" the girls ask.

"Remind me to change my mind about our crazy schemes earlier next time."

Thea rests her head on my shoulder as I page through the pictures. "Oh, that's a cute shirt," she says pointing at the screen.

"Check Seattle Goodwill in about a week. I bet you'll be able to get it for a fraction of what my Grandma paid for it." I laugh again. Laughing is better than crying.

"I feel so responsible," Thea says, her mouth falling back into a frown.

"We made our own decisions and we pay for them ourselves. It's not just your fault. I swear, I am not mad at you."

She sighs, but I think she believes me.

"Tell Nico we want to know where the afterparty is," Hanna says.

I tip my head and give her the stink eye. "Absolutely. No. Way."

"It's my last night of freedom," she whines.

"And you're going to spend it making up with your dad. End of story."

Hanna's face falls a little at the mention of her dad. My dad was pissed and it was only Tyler who got arrested. I can't imagine how pissed he'd be if he had to go to jail because of our idiotic plan. I know Hanna well enough to know she feels pretty horrible about what happened with her dad and she's not looking forward to owning up to her mistakes.

Sitting between us, Thea _almost _smiles. "Oh, Faith's getting bossy. Watch out."

Hanna and I both giggle. A little bit. We're all going to be okay. Grounded for the rest of our childhood, but okay. My phone buzzes. Thank goodness it's Nico and not my psycho clothes-stealing punisher of a mother.

_My brothers and I agree we like it best when you're all smiling and laughing. You have a really pretty smile. _

I'm in love.


	21. Chapter 21, The Dick

**A/N: This is the Dick's last chapter and I would just like to say THANK YOU to Trouble and Belladonna for being two of the classiest ladies I know in this fandom and for letting me play with them. It's been way too much fun writing this guy again. And to everyone out there who's been reading and laughing along with us. LOVE. Thanks guys.  
><strong>

**Thanks to SUEBEE for beta'ing our mess and to our pre-readers on this fuckery: **momof4, shana & KiKi**. LOVE ALL OF YOU LADIES TOO. Seriously.  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 21: THE DICK <strong>

**Sunday September 9th, 11:15PM EST**

It's very goddamn interesting, I think to myself as I'm sitting on the inside of a caged cell in the middle of the night... in fucking New York City, that no less than nine hours ago, I'd been thinking about how goddamn boring my case load was.

And when I say "interesting"? I, of course, mean _FUBAR _like a motherfucker. Completely and utterly fucked up beyond all recog-fucking-nition, my friends.

I mean, how fucking wrong is it that I'm the one that ended up in jail?

What makes this shit worse is that my own daughter is the one who landed me here.

_Fucking irony._

I'm sitting on the bench in this holding cell, with my head in my hands, leaning forward with my elbows on my knees while I wait for... what? Hell, I don't know, _somethin' _to happen. Maybe Swan'll make her way up to New York to kick my ass for getting arrested? Maybe Jazz'll break in at any moment and sneak me _and _my record out of here like a bat outta hell.

_And maybe Muldoon'll finally make that fatal fucking mistake so I can get his ass charged with conspiracy against the good City of Washington DC._

Right.

The quiet in this area of the building is killin' me and that big ass motherfucker that I'd found in the same dressing room as Hanna is in the cell next to me, pretty much staring the wall down across from him.

And I'm fairly fucking certain that he's winning the contest.

_No doubt re-thinking the events that un-folded back at the Music Hall, too._

I've since learned that he wasn't _actually _trying to molest Hanna. He's _actually _some kinda security detail for this hot shot computer businessman father of one of Hanna's friends.

Again... irony.

He'd shown up for the same reasons I had. To get a girl away from a fucking asshole before he did something to her he would definitely regret.

And judging from the charges against this guy, combined with the mangled, not-gonna-be-a-has-been-teen-pop-star-for-much-longer motherfucker over in the emergency room, I'm guessing this Jeeber asshat was already regretting that shit he'd pulled.

"She's a good girl, you know."

His words break through the air around the two us like a knife and I pull my head outta my hands to look over at him. "What?"

His eyes didn't blink or move for shit, he just keeps on staring at that wall for a while. "Your daughter. If I had got there a minute later, she would have already taken care of that guy for me. And this isn't the first time she's tried to take down someone who wanted to hurt her friends. She's pretty damn tough, that one."

I almost laugh at that shit. Almost. 'Cause he's right. If anyone knows how to defend herself, or other people, it's Hanna.

"She's a good friend, too. A little _misguided_. But a good friend, nonetheless."

He talks about Hanna like he knows her a little bit and I'm thinkin', he has a point, this guy. She _did _care about those girls a whole hell of a lot, so whatever it was that had made her decide to take matters into her own hands the way she had, _breaking the law_, even... was probably because she wanted to make one of them happy.

Something passed on to her from Swan. Mostly.

He finally looks over and makes eye contact with me. "Of course, let's not forget she's also one smart-mouthed, conniving hell on wheels, so... good luck with that."

Unfortunately, she's the spittin' image of her Dad in some ways, too. "Yeah," I breathe, but before I get anything else out about the matter, a guard to the jail comes through the barrier door with a few people.

Two, actually.

A dude that looks... _very _fucking familiar, and Hanna.

My eyebrows pull together tight as I watch her walk toward me, then stop.

She looks over at the big guy hesitantly and it seems to me like she's trying to get something out, but I can't figure out for the life of me what it could possibly be about.

'Til he cocks an eyebrow at her and she tells him, "You know it was all just part of the plan, right? I didn't mean all that... _stuff _I said."

I just shake my fucking head and let out some air, 'cause I can only imagine the shit that mighta come out of her mouth if she's now feeling so bad that she's apologizing to this guy.

He eyeballs her a little and then finally says, "You know you're smart and tough enough to get yourself out of trouble, but sometimes, the smartest and toughest thing to do is to make sure you don't find trouble in the first place."

Truer words, ladies and gentlemen. Truer words.

In some cases.

Ones consisting of a certain seventeen year old who thinks she's smarter than the average Dick.

But I digress.

After that, Faith's dad whispers something to Hanna, probably encouraging her to face her punishment and then goes about his own business with his security detail dude.

The guard opens up his cell, then mine... then leaves.

For a while, I just sit there, staring up at her. Thinking.

About how much I miss that little girl that used to look up to _me_ and ask me to teach her shit... like how to throw a fucking baseball at a batter so she'd strike him out every time, or how Algebra works... or hell, what brand of fucking spaghetti sauce I liked best while we shopped for dinner.

Now she's almost adult sized and probably ready as rain to get rid of her overbearing fucking father so she can go out and do crazy shit, like trying to meet some has-been rock star without anyone's permission or having to steal a car to do it.

In other words, she didn't need me anymore.

Hell, she never did.

And anyway, in all goddamn honesty, it's probably my fucking fault she's turned out the way she has. Which, when I really think about it... despite all the stress filled arguments about where she wants to go and who she wants to go with, and her constant battling the rules and her anti-parental-unit-attitude bullshit and bad-ass-nobody-tells-me-what-the-fuck-to-do exterior...

Is _perfect._

It's about the same time I have that thought that she utters the one word that always could take me down like nobody's business.

"Daddy?" she mutters, lookin' like she's afraid to even say the word. Then her chin starts wobbling and the tears start spillin'. And in turn, my heart aches like a motherfucker.

The tears are the real deal this time, too. I've seen the fake ones, plenty of times... these aren't fake.

She runs in to meet me and all I can do is throw my arms around her and hold her there, hoping to hold on to her for just a little while longer.

In more ways than one.

I also kiss the top of her head and hug the shit out of her.

Not literally. Jesus.

"You okay, kid?"

She nods into my chest and squeezes me so hard I think my ribs might fucking crack. "I'm sorry, Dad... I'm so sorry, I just wanted to help Thea meet her true love and I missed both her and Faith _so much _and I couldn't _stand _that she might not get to do something epically fun for herself and I swear I'll never do it again, just please don't hate me... _please_."

Okay, first of all, yeah _right_, she'll never do it again... like I hadn't heard that one before.

And secondly, "Hanna." I pull her away from me so I can look her straight in the fucking eyes for this.

"Are you nuts? I could never hate you, kid."

She tries to sniff the tears away but that's just not happenin'.

"Really?"

I laugh at her, 'cause fucking seriously? Is she kidding me with this shit? "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. How in the hell could I _ever _hate you?"

She hiccups and wipes some tears away. "How can I be the best thing that ever happened to you if I keep making you mad at me and driving you crazy?"

Point taken, but I shake my head at her anyway. Clearly she does not know her own goddamn mother.

"Hanna listen..." I sit her down with me on the cell's bench so that we're straddling it, facing each other. "I don't know _shit _about being a dad... hell, until I met your mom, I didn't even wanna _be_ a dad, but there's this one thing I do know that gets me through complete shit days like this one."

Another sniffle and then she rubs her nose with the sleeve of her shirt. "What?"

I look down at her hands, still smaller than mine... she's fiddling with her fingers like she always does when she's nervous. Another trait she picked up from her mom.

I take one of them into mine and I hold it up against my chest and it's all I can do to not get all choked up over this shit_._

Per the expression on her face, Hanna clearly doesn't know what the fuck to make of what I'm pullin' with her. Hell, I don't even know what to make of it. I don't typically _do _the heartfelt conversations, that's her mom's thing... but this one... this is all me, apparently.

I hold her chin with my free hand so she can't look away when I tell her what I'm about to tell her.

It's all in the eyes, my friends, the eyes don't fucking lie.

"That I fucking love you."

After a heartbeat or two and some lumps in my throat that I'm worried will give away what might be construed as weakness, I decide it best to add a little somethin' else, for the sake of a little bit of parental punctuation on the situation. "And that when we get home, I'm taking your bedroom door down, _all _of your fucking tennis-shoes, and every single piece of technology that you own away from you until the day you move out of the house."

I pause. "Maybe longer."

She manages a sad smile and then a slight, Hanna type huff that lets me know she's at least _starting _to snap out of her funk but then suddenly she's crying harder and throws herself in to me again, just holdin' on for dear life, I guess. I get it. I mean she did have a long night so I let her stay like that for a while, until it's time to break the _really _fucking bad news to her.

That it's time to go home and face her mom.

_Good luck with that one, Kid._


	22. Chapter 22, FaN Bella

**A/N: FINALLY! Thank you for indulging us in this. These characters are like our babies. It's hard to let them go. We're so happy some of you feel the same way! I can't tell you how much your sweet reviews make us smile. Your love for these guys means the world to us. One more regular chapter tomorrow and a fun little "epilogue" on Sunday. Thanks to Team Tricycle. We love you guys. **

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><p><strong>Chapter 22: FaN Bella<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 8:30 PM PST**

"Let me talk to him."

"Isabella, he can talk to you tomorrow."

He's kidding himself if he thinks I am going to wait until tomorrow. Tyler had to spend almost two hours in jail. I'm talking to him tonight. I'm not completely clear on what happened, but what I do know makes me want to ground my daughter until she's 35.

"Edward, put him on the phone or I'll call his cell. You can't stop me from talking to him."

I can hear him sigh, but then my husband relents and puts Tyler on the phone.

"Bella." His deep voice has always been a comfort of mine. My need to talk to him is completely selfish. I need him to talk me down after everything that has happened because no one does that better than my 50/50.

"Are you all right?"

"Of course I'm all right."

I smile at his cavalier attitude. "Your wife is not happy about all this work you made for her."

"My wife is going to have a field day defending me, who are you kidding? She's going to enjoy dragging this Jeeber guy through the mud as much as I enjoyed beating the shit out of him."

I can hear my daughter remind him to watch his language. _Now_ she remembers the difference between right and wrong.

"Faith really didn't see anything?" The thought of my daughter being in a room with a grown man, exposing himself and demanding sexual favors, makes _me_ want to beat the shit out of Dustin Jeeber, too.

"She did the right thing and came and got me almost immediately after she disappeared. Your daughter's crisis of conscience got her out of the situation before she was subjected to anything depraved."

"_My daughter_ should not have helped her friends get backstage in the first place. _My daughter_ should have stayed with you the entire night. _My daughter_ shouldn't have put you in the position you were put in tonight. Had she done what was right, you would not be facing criminal assault and battery charges."

"Bella, please. If it wasn't for Faith and her friends, this sicko would still be out there preying on young girls without enough sense to say no. You know this plan wasn't hers. Her friends aren't the best influence, but at least they knew better than to go along with what that Jeeber jackass wanted them to do. All I did was step in and make sure he's going to be singing in a different octave for the rest of his life."

Faith reprimands him again for his language.

"So you're saying I shouldn't give half of her clothes away to Goodwill and ground her for the next twenty years?"

Tyler chuckles. "I'm saying we've got a good girl here. You know that. You've had it real easy for fourteen years. I think you can cut her a little slack."

I know he's right. I have never had to punish Faith for much. I might be going a little overboard. Char was not happy with me when she found me in Faith's room, taking pictures of all the clothes I was going to make her give away.

"You're right."

"Of course I'm right. She's just like you. Thinks she can handle things she knows nothing about. Tries to take care of everyone. Need I remind you of the times you left your security? Or about the number of arguments we've had about your safety? Or how about the time you faced down a certain psychopath when I told you to stay in the goddamn car?"

Faith points out his third swear word.

"Perhaps I should be mad at you, then? Didn't I have you promise not to let her out of your sight?"

"I was waiting for that," he groans.

"Do we need to sign you up for early retirement? Put you behind a desk, old man?"

"Watch it now. Don't you dare put me out to pasture yet."

"I suppose I can't do without you. Even if you did lose my child and all."

"Nice," he scoffs. "It won't ever happen again, believe that."

I know he's not kidding. I don't really want him to feel bad. Kids will be kids. This won't be the last time we get the wool pulled over our eyes. I used to sneak out of the house to meet Jake in the middle of the night. My father would die if he knew what I got away with and I was a damn good kid.

"I believe you. You know I trust you with both of my children's lives."

"Good. Now quit worrying about me."

"I love you, so I'll worry about you forever. May I talk to my daughter?" I feel bad, knowing she's been beating herself up all night long. I've been nothing but tough with her all evening.

"Hi Mom," she says in that small and vulnerable voice of hers.

"I love you."

"You do?"

It breaks my heart to hear her question that.

"Of course I do. Don't be ridiculous. I would never stop loving you because you make one bad decision. Your brother makes some pretty bad decisions on a daily basis and I love him to Africa and back infinity times."

Alec looks up from his iPod and flashes me his killer smile. He's lucky he's so damn cute. He hasn't said a word, but I know the idea of his sister being in trouble instead of him has been quite refreshing. He hasn't left my side since we heard about the guy with the gun. He has wanted all the juicy details, even if he's only hearing them secondhand through me.

"I really am sorry," Faith says, the sniffle back in her voice.

"I know you are. You made a mistake and you tried to correct it. There isn't much more we could ask of you."

"I'll never leave my guard again."

I hear Tyler in the background saying he's heard that before. Seriously, the men in my life never let me live anything down.

"Never say never, sweetheart. Something tells me that is a promise you are not going to be able to keep." We can't expect her not to seek some freedom. Her leash is so damn short because her last name is Masen.

"I really won't, Mom. I hate making you guys mad. I really do."

Gah, she kills me with her sweet heart and soul. I'm certain she is God's gift to Edward, the perfect child who made it impossible for him not to fall madly in love with her, removing any doubt from his mind that he was not his father.

"I'm reconsidering my trip to Goodwill tomorrow. But you will find a way to make this up to Tyler."

"Really? I get to keep my boots?" she says hopefully.

"Really. Now put your father back on. I love you and I'll see you tomorrow."

"I love you too, Mom. To the moon and back."

"Infinity times."

"Always," she says. I couldn't love her more if I tried.

"Isabella, we just got back to the penthouse. Can I call you once I get our daughter to bed?" He sounds so weary. I can only imagine what a night it's been for him. He's been handling it a million times better than I would have thought. Edward is truly the man I hoped he could be. All those years of therapy have paid off.

"Fine, but can I tell you one thing?"

"Sure."

"You are the best father in the world."

"Ha! I let my daughter get herself into a situation that almost put her in a room with a disgusting pervert."

"You didn't _let_ her do anything. You trusted her. We trusted her. Had it not been for you, we wouldn't have been as prepared as we were."

"Remember that when I invest millions of dollars into a technology that allows me to pinpoint my child's whereabouts to the square millimeter."

I have to laugh. He's probably serious. "I love you. Thank you for holding it together and taking care of everyone over there."

"Next time, you get to take her to whatever concert or show she wants to go to."

"Good thing we're not letting her go to anywhere for a _long _while," I say with a smirk.

"Lucky you, my love." I can tell his mood is improving. "I'll call you later when Faith is asleep. We can facetime, you can show me a couple of things..."

I blush at his insinuation that I'm going flash him, something he asks for every time we're apart. "Oh my gosh, don't talk that way when everyone can hear you!"

"It's the only thing that will make me feel better, Isabella."

He's such a baby but, like his son, too cute to refuse. I put him on speaker phone. "We'll see. Say goodnight to Alec since he will not be in the same room with me when you call me back."

"Oh, that sounds like a yes not a we'll see. Goodnight, Alec! Love you."

"Goodnight, Dad! Tell Faith I said she's totally cool!" he says, not looking up from his game.

"Just what she needs to hear," Edward says with a sigh. "So glad you approve of her rebellion, son."

Alec gives me that smile again. I cock a brow at him and say to his father, "Tell her that he loves her and is glad she is all right. You can leave out the being cool part."

"Until later?" Edward says when I put the phone back to my ear.

"I haven't been able to resist you yet, have I?"

"I pray you never do, Isabella."


	23. Chapter 23, Thea

**A/N: This went from a silly idea hatched over one too many drinks (I speak only for myself with the drinking part) to an actual story with a plot that managed to bring me to tears from time to time. I'm so grateful I had the chance to write this with Jo & Amy. And I'm grateful that readers came along for the ride. After this, only an epi left to go! THANK YOU for reading. ~M  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 23: THEA<strong>

**Sunday, September 9th, 11:30 PM EST**

I'm grounded forever.

That's what Mom said.

And she looked so sad and tired when she told me. And then she went to call Dad. I can't even imagine what Dad's going to do to me. Take away my phone? Tell me I can't use the computer? Tear up my driving permit? I'm already grounded forever.

"But, I just -"

"Don't."

Mom wouldn't even let me talk.

"But you -"

"Thea! Not now. I can't do this now. Your father is _this_ close to getting on a plane. Stay in your room, young lady. I better be able to find you here when your Dad asks to speak with you."

"Dad?" I whined.

Mom gave me a warning look and I quieted down.

She doesn't get it, even though it's so obvious. I was just trying to be in love like she was.

Every once in a while she paces past my door and I can hear her talking fast, trying to calm Dad down. I pull the pillow over my head to block it all out. I don't even want to hear what she's saying.

In the dark and quiet my heart starts to hurt again. I can't cry anymore, though. I think it's because my insides are empty.

He didn't fall in love with me. Not even close. It was so different than my dreams; _he_ was so different than my dreams. He said that my name was cute and it doesn't even matter, because he was a big, stupid jerk.

I feel like a big, stupid, jerk.

I should have listened to Hanna. Dustin Jeeber's a douchebag. And even though he's a douchebag, it still kind of feels like I love him a little, and I hate that.

Maybe I'm a big, stupid jerk. Maybe it takes one to love one.

I hear the door click open, but I don't move. I stay really still, like maybe Mom will just leave and I won't have to talk to Dad. I feel the bed dip. I hold my breath, waiting for the inevitable.

"Thea?"

It's Edward. He hasn't said much to me at all since he found me backstage. He's just looked sad. I've made everyone in my family sad, except Dad who's probably really, really angry.  
>Edward's hand rests on my ankle. "It's okay. You don't have to say anything."<p>

That's good. I can't imagine what I'd say.

"If you wanted to meet him, you only had to ask."

Without thinking, I sit up. "But... but -"

Edward waits patiently for me to continue, his green eyes almost glowing in the dark room.

"But I wanted to be alone with him," I admit quietly.

A look of horror floats across Edward's face. He swallows. His jaw tightens. "Why?"

It's hard to admit why. It feels so dumb.

"So, I don't know... So... I guess so he'd love me," I say, studying the pattern on the hotel's duvet.

Edward sighs. I can't look at him at all. I really want to pull the pillow over my head again.

"Thea, honey, I don't think -"

"I mean, you would never have fallen in love with Mom if the first time you saw her, she had her parents with her, right?" I interrupt.

Edward doesn't answer. I've caught him. I knew it. But Edward's silence and Mom's voice on the phone makes me uneasy. I glance up at my step-dad and he looks really tense, and maybe a little mad.

"Do you know how many women found a way into my dressing rooms over the years, Thea? Do you know how many of them I fell in love with? Do you know why they might have wanted to be alone?"

That's definitely something I _never _thought about. Ever. Maybe he can see how horrified I am, because his voice is much softer when he continues.

"I can see you're hurt. I can imagine how you feel. But I want to be clear: breaking into dressing rooms to try to find love is an extremely flawed idea."

"But I wasn't _finding_ love. I already had it! I loved him."

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry, but it's just not true."

I scoot to the other side of the bed and fold my arms across my chest. "Of course it is! How can you say that? You know it could be true! Mom loved you before she met you!"

"When your mom and I first met, well, I'm not even sure she liked me, let alone loved me."

"Oh, she loved you. We've all heard the story." I roll my eyes for effect.

"Loving the _idea_ of a person is much different than loving the actual person."

Edward almost has a point. I'm not sure what to say. Dustin Jeeber wasn't what I thought he'd be like - at all. But...

"But, how come it still feels like I loved him?"

"The same heart gets broken either way," Edward says with a sad smile.

It takes hearing it out loud for it to really register. Dustin Jeeber just broke my heart. I pull my knees up to my chin and bury my face. Tears start to fall and a big pit in my stomach opens up. He didn't care about me at all. He just wanted me - and Hanna - to do things to his penis. He's gross.

Edward walks around to my side of the bed, wraps his arm around me and rocks a little. He kisses the top of my head and lets me cry.

"You know the first time I knew your mom loved me?" he eventually asks.

I've always loved hearing Mom and Edward's story. It's so romantic. They were like Romeo and Juliet, except they didn't die at the end. I've always known they fell in love the very first moment they looked at each other. I can't imagine when else it could have been. I shake my head.

"I knew it the first time we kissed – two and a half years after we first met," he explains.

"Really? Wow."

"Yep, wow."

"I can't imagine waiting two years," I sniff.

Edward laughs a little. "Neither could your mom. Try waiting twenty, though. It's possible. Love waits. It's not going anywhere. No need to pick locks and push your luck."

"I just wanted something as special as you guys have."

"Christ, Thea, I wouldn't wish our story on anyone, except maybe the asshole that they took out of the dressing room on a stretcher tonight. Your story just isn't written yet, but when it happens it's going to be unique, and beautiful, and your own, and it's going to blow your fucking mind."

I finally lift my head to raise an eyebrow at Edward. He tries not to smile. He knows what he's done.

"I think that "fuck" was totally warranted," he chuckles. "And tonight, I don't think it would even register with your mom. She's got bigger fish to fry."

"Like me," I grumble.

"Like calming down your father."

I actually shudder.

"Sometimes I think he's just waiting until I'm completely decrepit to kick my ass," Edward laughs bitterly as he stares out the window.

"Mom loves you way too much for Dad to ever want to really hurt you, silly," I say, trying to comfort Edward just like he did for me. I guess I was too wrapped up in myself to realize that he's a little scared, too.

He shakes his head, though. I don't think my comforting worked.

"Your Mom loved me so much, and I managed to hurt her so much, that what you're feeling right now is just a tiny fraction of her pain. When you open your heart to someone, you fly so high that you're amazingly vulnerable. Falling from those heights is..."

Edward closes his eyes and bites his lip. "Make sure the person you give your heart to is worth taking that chance, Thea. Not just the idea of the person. Get to know them through and through. Your heart's too important, Little One."

Edward kisses the top of my head and I hug him tight. I'm so lucky to have him around. He listens and he gets me when I'm sad, and he's way easier to talk to than Mom or Dad, usually. He doesn't yell or punish.

Someone sniffles and it's not Edward and it's not me. We both look up to see Mom standing in the doorway.

"Your Dad's on the phone, Thea," she says quietly, wiping her eyes.

I gulp.

Edward squeezes my shoulder as I stand up to face the music.

Mom hands me the phone, and the two of them leave the room together.

"You were so worth it," I hear her whisper as the door closes behind them.

* * *

><p><strong>cue Jo &amp; Amy's sniffles &amp; heart clutches.<strong>


	24. Chapter 24, the GChat

**A/N: Yep, this is "the end"... of this adventure {smiles} one more last huge THANKS times THREE to SueBee for beta'ing, and to Momof4, Serena for pre-reading. And to our readers who decided to take this crazy trip with us. We love you guys... more mushy sentiments at the bottom. LOVE.  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 24: GChat<strong>

**Saturday, November 10th **

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: 4563728551th day of my house arrest. Remind me to come up with a waaaaaaay better plan the next time we try to set Thea up with her dream guy.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Exaggerate much?

**JUSTTHEA_212**: LOL! BTW, don't worry about making plans. I am NEVER falling head over heels for a guy EVER again.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Who's exaggerating now?

**JUSTTHEA_212**: In all honesty, I don't think I can put my heart through that again. I hope no one ever breaks your hearts. It sucks. Bad.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Oh Thea! I just want to hug you. Don't give up on LOVE! Not when there are actual gentlemen out there that will love and appreciate you for the person you are. That reminds me, Nico sent me tickets to their show in Seattle. He's so sweet. I wish you guys lived here so we all could go together.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: ME TOO! But Bo did offer to send me tickets to every show on the east coast. Fly over here! For the love of God.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Calvin did the same for San Fran. I don't know. Maybe I'll go, but I'd have to go with my dad.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I have to go with my mom and TWO bodyguards. Lame.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: At least she's letting you go. I'm still grounded until my 18th bday if not further.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Like that's going to stop you :P

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: I didn't say I wasn't going, just that my parents won't be giving me their blessing. *winks*

**JUSTTHEA_212**: How are you even online? I thought your dad took all your gadgets away from you forever? LOL

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: He did... all the ones that he knows about anyway. ;)

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: OMG Hanna. To be inside your brain.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: It's scary.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I think you should go to their San Francisco concert, Thea. They put on a great show and you could get to know Calvin better. He's really sweet and funny. When Nico and I Skype, he's always doing silly stuff in the background to make me laugh.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Wonder why he's never in the background when Bo Skypes me? Oh yeah I remember...

**JUSTTHEA_212**: OMG Hanna you are such a bad influence on him.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: I'll admit I feel I've been VERY influential ;)

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I don't get it.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: *DED*

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Let's just say Bo probably won't be wearing that purity ring for much longer.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Why not?

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Covering my eyes, I don't think I want to know.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Because he apparently has extremely impure thoughts about my bodacious (.)(.) and might have even made some promises to act upon said impure thoughts the next time I manage to see him live and in person. *waggling eyebrows*

**JUSTTHEA_212**: OMG! You're joking. Are you joking? Tell me you're joking Hanna!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: He had impure thoughts about your eyes?

**JUSTTHEA_212**: ROTFLMAO

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: *DED*... Lower, Faith. LOWER

…

…

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: OMG! Hanna I swear to God...

**THEA_212**: I love you two sfm.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: I love you two more. So much more. How does that thing go that your dad always says to you, Faith? To the moon and back and to Italy or something?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I used to get a little carried away when I was little. Now we go with - to the moon and back infinity times.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: YEP. That's it, that's how much I love you guys.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Who would have thought Hanna was the mushiest of all?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I knew she was all marshmallow under that tough exterior.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Hey, I just mean, you know, you guys are pretty cool.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Uh huh.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Sure Hanna.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: OK seriously... Promise me we'll never lose touch. EVER. Even if your parents forbid you from seeing me. LOL I need level headed people in my life. According to Dad, anyway.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Oh Hanna! We'll always be friends. Always! Plus, I think Tyler likes you. I heard him tell my dad that he should hire you in a few years. Can you imagine how awesome that would be if you were my bodyguard?

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Why do I think your dad will not hire her as YOUR bodyguard?

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY: **Come on! I would be awesome. Who would protect Faith better than me? Really? And as long as I'm not joining the poh-poh, my dad would sooooo be on board with that!

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Maybe you could be Bo's bodyguard.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Now there's an idea. I would guard his body real nice.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Why do I think you're being dirty?

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: I know exactly which part of his body I want to guard. And which part of my body I would guard it with...

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Yep, she's being dirty.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I don't think that's what Tyler was talking about when he said he thought you'd be good at it.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: I bet Bo will think she's good at it.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: *nods head* He'd make a great first... you know.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: OMG you two! I have to go to bed. Church in the morning.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: At least one of us is bound for heaven.

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Hey now, I'm angelic. 0:)

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Maybe they'll let me in if both of you vouch for me.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I will always vouch for you xoxoxoxoxo

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Me too! But I have to go - Calvin's trying to Skype me.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Calvin's trying to Skype you...maybe you can talk about your (.)(.)

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Do not talk about your boobies! Calvin is so sweet. Go! Give him a chance! True love does exist! I know it does, Thea!

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Eyes, Faith. I meant they should talk about her beautiful eyes. Jeez!

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Mmm hmm, Hanna. And I'm not in love. But Calvin is pretty cute. And funny. And talented. And did I mention cute?

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: He's all those things. They make him very lovable...

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: And he probably has a huge...

**JUSTTHEA_212**: OMG Hanna. Stop!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: I'm not even going to ask what because I know I will just be grossed out. I will pray for you in the morning, Hanna.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: What? I was going to say heart. OMG you two and your dirty little minds. Shame on you! Go Skype his cuteness! xo

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: And tell him to tell Nico that I miss him! :)

**JUSTTHEA_212**: Will do. And should I tell Bo that you're having impure thoughts, Hanna?

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Nope. He already knows. ;)

**JUSTTHEA_212: **Of course he does. I know it's already been said, but I love you guys.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Now it's Thea's turn to get mushy.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: See! You haven't given up on love. I knew it.

**JUSTTHEA_212: **I'll never give up on loving you two. OMG. Calvin won't leave me alone. I've got to go. Night!

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Night, Thea!

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Sweet dreams!

_**JUSTTHEA_212 has left the conversation**_

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: *chuckle* Thea's not falling for Calvin AT ALL.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Yeah, her light's not going out anytime soon.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Now, about that job. Tell that ten-foot tall bodyguard of yours that I am totally interested. As long as I get a car, a new M1911Colt hand gun, and one of those cool blinking light thingies so I can see my dad coming a mile away next time.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH: **Oh Hanna, Hanna, Hanna. I bet after one week of training with Tyler, your new-found respect for authority would make you unrecognizable - especially to your dad!

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: *DED* I **DARE** him to try to tame me.

**HAVE_A_LITTLE_FAITH**: Oh boy, it's on. Night Hanna.

**BO_IS_MYYUMMYCABANABOY**: Night! xoxo

**…**

**PENNYWARD POV**

Faith logs out and I close my laptop. It appears I will never be able to stop worrying about her even if she is perfection personified. I take no credit for the way she's turned out, but thank God everyday.

I pick up my phone and call Tyler.

"Sir?"

"I need you to assign one more guard to take Faith and Isabella to the concert in Seattle in a few weeks." My daughter may be perfect, but if one of those Janus boys wants to see boobs, I trust _none_of them.

"No problem, sir."

"And I just want to be clear about one thing. All new hires to the security team need to have my final approval. Are we clear?"

"Clear, sir. Are we hiring?"

"No. We are _not _hiring."

We say our goodnights, and I call Peter. One more thing to take care of before I head up to bed with my Isabella.

"Masen! Dude, I was just thinking about you. TMZ ran this whole story on Jeeber's penile reconstruction. Holy shit, Tyler did some damage. It's pretty fucking funny."

Nothing about Dustin Jeeber is funny. The man is alive only because I figured the public humiliation would be worse than death, and so far, I'm correct.

"Be sure you send all the information regarding our internet tracking system over to that private dick in DC. He's got some IT guy he trusts, but I promised we'd share."

"The girls planning their next big adventure?" Peter chuckles on the other end of the phone, and he's lucky he's not here so I can smack him upside his head.

"Let's just say I think _that_ guy needs this software a hell of a lot more than I do."

* * *

><p><strong>A few notes from us to you guys:<strong>

****Marie's A/N: I feel very lucky. 1) To have two of the most amazingly supportive, talented, funny, and all-around awesome friends a girl could have in Amy & Jo. I was in awe of them both before I was fortunate enough to get to know them. I'm still in awe today. 2) To have a community of friends in TLS, in FiP, in the BDC group on facebook, on Twitter, and probably a few other places I'm forgetting. 3) And I'm honored to have people that are willing to read the words I write and review faithfully. I don't take it for granted for a minute. I'm going to answer Amy's questions preemtively: Yes. Absolutely. Just say when and where. Much love, xxx ~M****

**Trouble's A/N: Flashback to Jan. 15th. I'm sitting in Jo's house with Jo on one side and Marie on the other, and Sue across from me. I say - so what about doing another mashup? But this time, to make it less confusing, we make it a mini-fic. Each POV gets their own chapter. Marie or Jo says - Like a drabble? I say - NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! This is not a drabble. It's a mini-fic, damn it. They all say they're in. We start brainstorming. Jo gets her computer. We come up with an outline for a good 20 chapters. Someone says - this is like a _real_ story. Yes. It is. The rest is history. Thank you for reading something that seriously made me deliriously happy to write. I know there was no smut, no lemons, and it focused on three original characters instead of the Twilight crew, but you read it anyway and I appreciate it. Our beta, Suebee, has a great eye and is always encouraging and I love her dearly. Our pre-readers know how to make us smile with their love for these characters that they helped nurture way back when, especially my girl, Momof4. And to Jo and Marie - I love you with all my heart. **To the moon and back, ladies. Infinity times. **You two inspire me everyday. You entertain me with your talent and your humor. And make me smile because of your beautiful hearts. You support me with your words of love when I dare to write. You get me and I am so grateful. Can we do this again? And again? And again?**

**Jo's A/N: I'm never gonna forget how much fun this was. I'm never gonna forget how lucky we are to have readers who are interested in seeing what happens with these three... or how supportive SueBee was throughout the whole thing, making sure the chappies got beta'd before posting EVERY day... or the terrific feedback we got from the pre-reads... you guys are all fantastic people. Amy and Marie... _THANKS_ for letting me play with you. It makes my heart happy and my face smile. I LOVE YOU GUYS. Sofa King Much. Major, major gracias to everyone reading - for indulging our love affair with characters who don't exist. {smiles}**

**OH! And congratulations to the highly talented mofo, belladonnacullen, for winning FIC OF THE YEAR over at THE LEMONADESTAND for her story, "There is a Light". Most deserving, and truly inspiring. WOOOOOOOT!  
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**XOXOXOXOXO from us to you! See ya real soon!  
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